AJR Incorrect Quotes

59

(A/N) Soo, I told my mom I got 7k views on this book and she was like "you should do something to celebrate!"

Uh, so, what should I do to celebrate? Please put suggestions in the comments! :D

Also, thank y'all so much! <3

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Cop: You have the right to remain silent!

Jack: But do I have the ability?

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Adam: You guys are really bad with boundaries.

Ryan: Oh yeah? Name one boundary we've crossed.

*Earlier that day*

Jack and Ryan, picking the lock to Adam's apartment with a toothpick: yo, can we hang out?

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Adam, in the hospital: Hey, did the doctor say my results are ready yet? I'm dying from worry over here.

Jack, holding the results: I can tell you now it's not just worry.

Adam: What

Jack: What

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Jack: Hold on! I'm having one of those things..... A headache with pictures!

Alba: What the f*ck?

Adam and Ryan: He's having an idea.

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(When Jack and Ryan were little kids)

Their Mom: So, how did babysitting your little brothers go?

Adam: Well, they wanted ice cream for breakfast and when I told them they couldn't, they said I wasn't their best friend anymore. So we made a compromise.

Their Mom: ...... Which was?

Adam: They're on their second bowl of ice cream and now I'm their best friend in the whole universe!

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(Ryan and Adam are trying to help Jack flirt with Alba)

Adam:  Okay, let's start small. Ryan will tell you the compliment and you repeat it to Alba, got it?

Jack: Got it.

*Later, when Alba shows up*

Alba: Hi, Jack! Isn't it a lovely day?

Ryan, whispering in Jack's ear: Tell her "it's not as lovely as you"

Jack: It's not as lovely as me.

Adam and Ryan: *Facepalms*

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Ryan: I took a look in my wardrobe today and asked myself "does a grown man dress like this?"

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Adam: Guess what number I'm thinking of.

Jack: 420?

Adam: No, that's really immature of you. Someone else guess and please take this seriously.

Ryan: 69?

Adam: Yeah, it was 69.

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Adam: This is stupid.

Jack, sitting on Adam's shoulders: The higher I am the better I see.

Adam: But- we're the same height.... And I can see just fine...

Jack: Hush now, Adam. I am searching.

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Jack, singing break my face: Life gives you lemons-

Ryan: And when life does that, use the lemons to make a bomb.

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Adam: Jack, is it true you spent three days in the trunk of Ryan's car just so you could scare him?

Jack: What?! No!

Jack: It was five days!

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(When they were kids)

Adam: Hey, mom. Ryan and Jack didn't finish their sandwiches.

Their Mom: Okay? Just throw them out.

*Later*

Adam, helping pack Jack and Ryan's bags: I know, I was surprised about this as much as you are.

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Ryan: How could someone say Jack's evil? He's the most precious, soft, little soul.

Jack, wiping blood off of his face: Yeah! I'm f*cking ADORABLE!

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(When they were kids)

Their Mom: Explain right now.

Adam: It was Jack.

Ryan: It was Jack.

Jack: It was Jack- wait.

Jack: Damn, why does that always happen?

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(Going to school)

Adam: Jack, you're going to get dress coded.

Jack: There's no dress code in FABULOUSNESS!

Adam:

Adam: That doesn't change the fact that you're not wearing pants, Jack.

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(When they were little and Adam has to wake up Jack and Ryan in the morning)

Adam, shaking Ryan awake: Good morning! Time to get up!

Ryan: Five more minutes...

Adam: Okay, fine.

~

Adam: Time to get up, Jack!

Jack: Five more minutes...

Adam, holding up a bucket of water: Perhaps you misheard.

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Jack: If you were given money or brains, which would you choose?

Adam: Money.

Jack: Stupid, I would've chosen brains.

Adam: People choose what they don't have.