(A/N) What's your favorite AJR webisode? Mine's probably Hoops. X3
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Jack, yelling at Ryan from downstairs: RYYYY!!
Ryan, yelling back: What?!
Jack: I'm homicidal!
Ryan: Wait, did you say homicidal or suicidal?
Jack: HOMICIDAL!
Ryan: Good. Keep it that way!
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Ryan: *Hugs Adam*
Adam: What was that?
Ryan: Affection!
Adam: Disgusting.
Adam: .....Could you do it again, please?
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Ryan: Violence isn't the answer.
Jack: You're right. Violence is a question
Jack: And the answer is YES.
Ryan: NO!
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Alba: What's wrong with you?!
Jack: I have this weird self-esteem issue where I hate myself but I still think I'm better than everyone else.
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(When they were little)
Adam: Alright guys, let's go over the plan one more time.
Adam: If something breaks?
Jack and Ryan: Try and fix it before mom and dad get home.
Adam: And if that doesn't work?
Ryan: We blame it on Jack.
Jack: F*ck you guys.
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Jack: My criminal record? The only illegal thing I've done is absolutely killing it on stage!
Jack: Ha, just kidding. I've killed several men.
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(First time meeting Alba)
Jack, trying to flirt: I really like your name.
Alba: Thanks, I got it for my birthday!
Adam, whispering in Jack's ear: You sure you want this one?
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Adam: Wait, HOLD THE F*CK UP!
Jack: I'm the f*ck up
Jack: Please hold me.
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(When they were little)
Their Mom: Who taught the baby (Jack) to say "Sh*t"?!
Ryan: Not me, mom. I say f*ck.
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Jack: Alright, give me your hairdryer.
Alba: What? What are you talking about?
Jack: Don't you carry one in your purse?
Alba: Have you ever met a human woman before? We don't just carry hair dryers in our bags!
(Later)
Jack: Hey, do you have a hairdryer in your bag?
Adam: Of course. I'm not an animal.
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Ryan: Heard you like bad boys, huh?
Ryan: Well I'm bad at everything.
Ryan: *Winks with both eyes*
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Ryan, getting down on one knee: Alba, will you do me the honor of becoming my sister-in-law?
Alba:
Jack: Did you just propose to her for me?!
Ryan: Well someone had to.
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Jack: My therapist told me a great way to get rid of anger is to write letters to the people I hate, and burn them.
Jack: Well, I did that and now I don't know what to do with the letters.
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Adam: Am I a good person? No.
Adam: But do I try to be better every single day?
Adam: Also no.
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Jack: I can't believe we got locked out of our apartment! Ryan, hurry and give me your credit card.
Ryan: Here.
Jack, pocketing it: Cool. Adam, kick the door down.
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Jack: Bigfoot but shaven
Ryan: That's just Mr. Clean.
Adam: *Internally screaming*
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Austin: What scares you guy's the most?
Ezra: Ghosts.
Jack: Pigeons.
Ryan: The unstoppable marching of time that is slowly guiding us all towards an inevitable death.
Adam: Ryan.
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Jack: What's your type, Alba?
Alba: Tall, dumb, brown hair, hazel eyes, great singing voice, talented, energetic, sweet.
Jack: That kinda sounds like me.
Jack: What a coincidence, haha.
Alba: Did I mention dumb?
Jack: Yeah.
Alba: K, just checking.
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Ryan: I'm giving up alcohol for a month.
Adam: Really?
Ryan: Wait, that didn't come out right.
Ryan: I'm giving up. Alcohol for a month.
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AJR Incorrect Quotes
HumorY'all probably already know what Incorrect Quotes are, so just read the book. This is completely random, but idrc.
