(A/N) Would anyone like to be friends? (≧▽≦) (Not a very AJR related question, but I just thought I'd ask, haha)
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Adam: Can you pass me the salt?
Ryan: Huh? The what?
Adam: The salt.
Ryan: HUH?
Adam: *Long suffering sigh*
Adam: The ocean cocaine?
Ryan: Oh, yeah. Sure.
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Jack: I want to tell you guys a joke but I can only remember the punchline.
Adam: Go ahead.
Jack: Tooth-hurty.
Adam and Ryan: When is the best time to go to the dentist?
Jack: You two complete me.
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Jack: I can't stand you!
Adam, sipping his tea: Then sit down.
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Ryan, texting Adam: I accidentally spilled soup on the floor.
Ryan: Does the five second rule apply to soup?
Ryan:
Ryan: Please hurry, it's already been three seconds.
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Jack: Dating tip! Hold the door open for your date. Rip the door off its hinges. Use the door to fight other men. Establish dominance!
Adam: How the f*ck did you ever get a girlfriend?
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Flight Attendant: Please make sure all small items are secure.
Adam and Ryan, whispering at Jack: Do you feel safe, bud?
Jack: I'm the same freaking height as you two.
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Adam: Who ate my fries? I'm going to f*cking ki-
Ryan: I did.
Adam: -Kiss you on the cheek and hug you and buy you more fries because you haven't been eating enough.
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(When they were kids)
Their Mom: I know you snuck out last night, Jack Evan Metzger!
Jack's inner voice: Play dumb!
Jack: Who's Jack Evan Metzger?
Jack's inner voice: Not that dumb!
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Adam: Everytime Jack's dog whines, I want to kill it just a little.
*Everyone looks at him, concerned*
Ryan: Okay! I think that's enough Minecraft for today..
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Jack: People say I have a unique way of lighting up a room!
Adam: No, it's called arson, and those people are witnesses.
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Person: You have the chance to do the right thing.
Jack: I love those moments.
Jack: I like to wave at them as they pass by.
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Person: So what do you all do in the band?
Jack: Oh, I'm the lead vocalist but I also play guitar, drums, ukulele, and use the sample machine. And I also write song lyrics.
Ryan: I play keyboard, ukulele, and sing. I also write lyrics and produce.
Adam: I make good life decisions.
Person: That's not really-
Ryan: No, trust us. He's the most important member.
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Adam: We used to think that no girl was good enough for our dear brother Ryan.
Cat: Oh, thank-
Jack: And we still think that.
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Adam: Why are you covered in blood?!
Ryan: It's not mine.
Adam: Is that supposed to make us feel better?
Ryan: Of course.
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Jack: Adam gave me a "get better soon" card.
Ryan: Aw, that's so sweet-
Jack: I'm not sick, he just thought I could do better.
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YOU ARE READING
AJR Incorrect Quotes
HumorY'all probably already know what Incorrect Quotes are, so just read the book. This is completely random, but idrc.