Soooo sorry for the long wait but read author's note at end!
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Irresistible.
//Don't try to make me stay
Or ask if I'm okay
I don't have the answer
Don't make me stay the night
Or ask if I'm alright
I don't have the answer//
He didn’t want to stay. He didn’t want her to ask him if she was okay, because he didn’t know.
She hurt him. He had to keep constantly reminding himself in the midst of their cuddling session. But as she lay in his arms, her eyes fluttering shut, every inch of her body pressed up against his, he didn’t care. He wanted to forget that for seven months, she ignored him- ignored every text, every call, everything, but right now all he cared about was the fact that this time, she didn’t ignore him.
She actually answered his text, and opened the door when she saw him on her doorstep though months ago she had never even bothered to like a picture on his Instagram.
It was late, already 11pm. He was comfortable on her couch with her wrapped in his arms, the fire was burning low and the rain dropped outside. He knew it was dangerous to go out and drive home. He knew very well that Bethany would insist on him staying at her house as soon as he mentioned leaving, but he couldn’t.
He didn’t want to stay the night, he didn’t want the walls that too him so long to build, to crash down with a simple push that she gave him. But he had waited for this for so long, he had missed the feeling of having her in his arms, for so long.
He didn’t know if he was okay, he didn’t want her to ask if he was alright, he had no idea, because as she lay in his arms, the sweet scent of the candles that were burning around the room, her fingers interlaced perfectly with his, he couldn’t straight, his mind was a jumble of thoughts.
He didn’t know if he was alright, but he was sure better than he had been the best seven months.
//Heartache doesn't last forever
I'll say I'm fine
Midnight ain't no time for laughing
When you say goodbye.//
He knew that heartache doesn’t last forever, but this was as close to forever as he ever had been.
Seven months of seeing her look so happy, traveling all around the world, seeing her success as an artist and youtuber- it killed him because he wasn’t there with her. He wanted to be part of the reason that she was so happy. He wanted to travel with her, he wanted to go to the beach with her in Mexico, he wanted to see the view from the Great Wall of China with her, he wanted to Bollywood dance with her in India, he knew they would take all these places by storm. He wanted to see her career grow, he wanted to be there with every step of the way. He wanted to be there at all her award shows, wanted to see her walk her first runway, wanted to be the first to listen to her new album.
He thought about all of this and more everytime Julianne or Mark brought her up, he thought it, but never said it out loud. Out loud, he would say he was fine, even though he was far from that
He turned his head to look at the clock, his eyes widening as he saw it was already midnight. They had been sitting in silence just wrapped in each other for four hours, no words passed them, no kisses, just love
He remembered the last night they had been together at midnight. That was the last time they would ever see each other before this, they had been laying on the bed, much like the same way they were wrapped up in each other now.
