It's always been you, April Kepner

arguments

go it alone
season 10 ep 20

🎵It'll Be Okay-Shawn Mendes🎵

"I will love you either way"

~~~~~

"Madelyn!" Cristina exclaims as she watches the younger Shepherd walk towards the nurses station "Tonight is your lucky night because I will go drinking with you"

"Hmm. Can't" Madelyn replies

"You suck" Cristina frowns "Kepner" she says seeing the redhead walk towards them

"Yeah?" April says perkily

Cristina pauses "Never mind" she says earning a glare from Madelyn as she walks away

"That was weird" April says standing next to Madelyn

"It's Cristina, what do you expect?" Madelyn shrugs

After a moment of silence April says "I uh- had this patient this morning in the E.R. This kid had a dog bite, so Jackson treated her and when he realised she was deaf he instantly suggested a cochlear implant-"

"The kid didn't already have one?" Madelyn questions

"No, because the parents want to immerse her in the deaf community" April replies

"Uh huh" Madelyn replies not completely paying attention to the redhead "I've got a couple more patients in post-op to check on then i'll be ready to go, so i'll see you at home later" she says placing a kiss on April's cheek as she walks off 

~~~~~

Unaware that their conversation they had earlier would cause such an issue Madelyn finds herself arguing with April "...And it's not like I'm insensitive to deaf culture or anything. I just don't... I don't get how, as parents, you don't want your kid to experience hearing, if they could" she say

"They're her parents, Mads, not us" April replies

Madelyn sighs "Yeah, well, if that was our kid, she'd be fitted for an implant three years ago"

April looks up from her food "Really?"

"Yeah"

"Just like that? What if I... felt differently about it?" April asks

"Do you?" Madelyn questions

"Yeah" April replies

"O-okay"

April puts her fork down "Don't do that. Don't dismiss how I feel. My opinion matters. I am one half of this relationship. It's my kid, too, and it's not getting a cochlear implant"

"All r..."

April interrupts "It's important that we immerse them in the deaf community, who consider deafness, by the way, to be a blessing and not a disability, instead of just opting for an elective surgery"

"I'm sorry. A-a blessing?"

-

Madelyn gets up from the table

"Don't do that! Don't walk away from me when I'm in the middle of a sentence" April says

"Can we just go to bed, please?" Madelyn asks

"I can't sleep now, not when you're willfully ignoring my wishes, my beliefs..."

"About what? Our fictitious child? It's irrelevant. You know how slim the chances are of our kid being deaf?" Madelyn replies

"That is not the point!" April yells

"What is the point?" Madelyn replies

"You... you think they're stupid. You think that they are being bad parents because they want to raise their kid differently than you would" April accuses

Madelyn scoffs "Come on. I never said that"

"You are judging them! You think they're ridiculous"

"Why are we arguing about this?" Madelyn asks

"Because it means you think I'm ridiculous, too!" April yells

"Wait a second. What?" Madelyn asks confused

"Replace "cochlear implant" with the word "christening"..."bible study"..."prayer." Now tell me this has nothing to do with us"

-

"Okay, I think you're blowing this out of proportion" Madelyn says

"Am I? Because this is who I am. At my core, this... this defines me"

"And I know that. I love you still" Madelyn says

April scoffs "Oh, well, thank you. Thank you so much for loving me anyway... despite my beliefs, despite my faith, which I happen to hold above everything else"

"You're twisting my words. It's not..."

April interrupts "And you're ignoring mine! You don't accept who I am or what I believe. You tolerate it. You judge it. You judge my faith because you don't have any"

"I have faith. I have faith in medicine. I have faith in helping people"

"That's not faith! Faith is believing in what you can't see. Will you just admit it, Maddy? You think what I believe is ridiculous" April yells

"No" Madelyn replies softly "It's not, but it's also not something I believe and you have to understand that too. April I love you. So please can we stop arguing about our hypothetical child and go to bed"

April let's out a deep sigh "I hate arguing with you"

"Then let's not" Madelyn says "Please"

"Okay..."