Frozen (Frat Boy Niall) EDITING

Chapter 87

Not edited
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Songs:

Clouds ~One Direction

Kings ~Lauren Aquilina

"You know you can talk to me, Niall." Small, delicate hands plunged through my matted hair, lightly rubbing against my scalp before pulling out and continuing the cycle. My eyes closed at the touch and for once I felt stillness. I felt the world around me come to a stop but I couldn't tell exactly if it was a good or bad thing.

My heart felt like it was a dart, drilling against my ribcage, striking me right in the center of the chest. Everything was just piling up and there was so much on my mind that I didn't even know where to start. It's been one thing after another and I'm starting to realize that's it's just how it is and I have to just suck it up and deal with it. I don't know where to start, but you have to start somewhere, right? Time keeps ticking and the sun keeps rising and like a feather in the wind, you have to be willing to just life take you and guide you. There's no stopping the outside forces around you no matter how much you want to.

"I just... so much, Khloe. There's been so, so much and I don't know how much more I can take." I blinked my eyes open, staring at her from below. We were sat on the couch, my head on her lap again. I must say, it was a pretty comfortable spot. She weakly smiled and tilted my chin up further than I already was and leant down to softly kiss me. I felt the usual fire in my gut ignite and the flames spread through my veins as her plump lips lightly dragged across my thin ones, sealing our bodies together the best that we could manage.

I think I've figured out that the joy isn't in our items and the things we receive, but rather in ourselves. There is no one thing that can make you happier than what you want to be or are willing to be.

And I know that I'm saying this on an empty heart, but once you see the stars, it becomes easier to understand. The way they crash and burn around us, blinding our eyes in an odd firm of beauty. Once you see past the picture, though, you start to realize that everything around you is just like that star. They are one in a million pixels making up that so called beautiful picture. Know one ever knows what's really on the inside and what your past holds, yet for some reason we still tend to judge based on what's visible to the eye rather than the heart.

When she pulled away, the pads of her fingers lightly brushed across my cheeks, her hands still cupping my face.

"Tell me about yourself, Niall." I jerked my head to look at her better. What does she mean? She knows almost everything about me that a person possibly could.

"Huh? You know my background and my stor-"

"No. Not that, but your real self. How you were before you met me. Not the partying and sleeping around, but what it was like on the inside." I creased my brows, really thinking about her request. How I felt on the inside when all of that was happening? I-I...

"Shit, Khloe. The real, pin-pointed, clear-as-day definition as shit." I sighed. That's how I felt. "It wasn't fun or happy. It was actually quite sad and pitiful." I stared at the ceiling just letting my mind wonder and mouth ramble. It was so easy talking to Khloe. It always has been, but I didn't think that talking about my past face to face would be this easy but it was surprisingly.

"Tell me, Ni." She ran her soft hands threw my hair. Her little nickname was growing on me. I noticed that she would mainly only ever use it in times of nurturing me, as if I needed to be treated with special care because to her I was so fragile. Letting out a sigh, I just decided to talk, ramble on, letting my mind guide me. No judgement, just me venting myself and all the built up emotions and anxiety to her.