see you later // Pablo Gavi

Chapter 32

𝒀𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆 𝒉𝒖𝒓𝒕𝒔.

"𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐎𝐍 𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐇 𝐃𝐈𝐃 𝐈 𝐒𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐊 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐑𝐄𝐆𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐆𝐀𝐕𝐈?" I ask, as if it is so far fetched for me to be sleep talking about him. I think about him way too much. What did I accidentally sleep talk so loud that Ferran heard through his headphones and Pedri is too embarrassed to talk about? Ferran hasn't even told me anything yet, but I already feel sorry to him. Because I have thought some pretty... let's just say visual stuff about Gavi. And if I said any of those dreams out loud, in poor Ferran's ear, he deserves a lot more from me than an apology.

"Well," Ferran sighs."One second." He turns to Pedri and Ansu Fati, who is sitting in the aisle seat next to his window seat directly in front of mine. "Can we do some seat switching here so I can sit next to Ember and talk to her?" Ferran asks the two of them.

Ansu shrugs, standing up, but Pedri is more reluctant, rolling his eyes, saying, "Ferran, you really don't have to tell her."

"Now I have to, Pedri. Now she's curious. Come on now. Let me switch seats."

After about a minute of shifting and moving, I end up with Ferran next to me, Pedri in front of me, and Ansu remaining in his original spot. "So, Ferran. I'm curious, you're right. So get to it."

He grins, just a little bit, before saying, "Okay, so here's some of the things I heard you muttering through my show that I was watching. 'Gavi, the truth is I like you... I like your...'" Ferran stops to chuckle.

"Just get on with it!" I say, nervous and irritated.

"'Kay. You said stuff like this, but it was less... Well, your grammar sucked, and it was choppy, but obviously that's because you were sound asleep. So you said stuff like this: 'I like your laugh, and your smile, and your beautiful face. I like how strong you are and I love everything about you. Can you please tell me the same thing? Whenever I see you, you make my day. I cry because you don't like me back and if you do then just freaking tell me, Gavi. I love your name...'" Through the whole time, Ferran mimics me, doing a higher voice, imitating me in an annoying way. "'I love you, Gavi. Can you please love me back?' Then you started crying, nearly, and I turned around and said to Pedri, 'Dude, I think she's crying.' And Pedri leaned you against him and put his arm around you and you went into a deep enough sleep that you finally shut up."

I blink, staring at Ferran. "I did not say that!"

"I swear, you did! I have a recording!"

"You recorded me?!"

"Yeah, but don't worry. I'm not like Pablo over there. I didn't post it on every single social media platform I have or anything. I didn't send it to anyone, either. I swear it on my dogs' lives."

I sigh, nodding. "Can I hear the recording?"

He lets me listen to it, and it is embarrassing. Awful, honestly. And he's right- I do talk extremely loud in it. And although it is choppy and sleepy sounding, it is easy enough to hear exactly what I'm saying. And Ferran is pretty much right on what I said.

I feel sick. And warm. I clutch my stomach.

Ferran says, lowering his voice, "So you really do like him, then?"

I nod, feeling lightheaded.

"Only me, Pedri, and maybe Lewandowski and Ansu heard... And, uhm, maybe, uh..." he looks uncomfortable, glancing down.

"What, Ferran?" I ask, feeling urgent and shaky.

"Gavi might have heard, too. I'm not sure."

Now I understand why Pedri was so sure on not telling me about my sleep talking. It's because Pedri really is a good friend. I mean, he comforted me. I knows the extreme soft spot I have for Gavi, and only he really knows. Only he has let me cry into him. So in my sleep,  he knew all I needed to shut me up was a comforting arm around me and him to lean against. And he also knew how sick this information would make me feel. How worried. I'm glad Ferran told me. But I am also thankful to Pedri for showing such care for me.

Why don't I like Pedri? He'd probably be better for me. But I don't! I love Gavi! No matter what. I can never imagine myself looking at Pedri more than I really good, sweet friend. I would hope he feels the same way. But Gavi? Maybe Gavi likes me as a good, sweet, friend, too, and it's just me who is obsessed with the idea of dating him. That thought shatters me to pieces. I lean over Ferran to glance at Gavi. He's zoning out at the floor, drinking from his water bottle, listening to something in his headphones. And he looks as handsome as ever.

I sigh, putting my head in my hands. Ferran very awkwardly puts a hand on my back, saying, "I'm sorry, Ember."

"I should be thanking you. Thank you for telling me I said all that, Ferran. Now I know I can't be sleeping on buses anymore, right?" I try to sound lighthearted, despite my stressed out state.

"Wanna switch back to sitting with Pedri?" he asks. I can feel the awkwardness radiating him. Ferran, ever since I met him first, has had this awkward feel to him. Or nervous. Or something.

I nod. "Yeah, thanks Ferran."

They switch back, and Pedri looks at me a few seconds, then mutters, "Do you want to talk?"

I sigh, then start talking to him very quietly, to avoid easedropping, "I don't know what to do about Gavi. I know I should just leave it. Give up on him. He's probably not even a good guy for me. But he feels like the best guy for me. But he just won't... he won't do anything."

"Sure... Yeah, that's... hard..." he says softly, seeming to be thinking about something.

"What is it?" I ask him, knowing the gears in his mind are turning.

"Maybe you're right, that you aren't right for each other. But maybe you're not. I have a feeling... Gavi might like you, too, okay? He acts like it. Maybe he's just nervous to. Or didn't know you like him back. But now he has heard you sleep talk it. So it has got to be pretty clear to him. But he still might be nervous. So, tell you what? How about if I talk to him about it later for you? Like, say, 'Man, you really should just ask her out already. She totally likes you, she's told me, so just do it already. She feels like you're leaving her hanging.'"

I sniff, fighting off tears. "I don't know... What if it doesn't go good?"

"Ember, think about this. Could anything go worse than how things are going for you right now?"

I sigh, shaking my head, leaning against his chest. Wishing I could be leaning against Gavi's, and not Pedri's. "Okay... You can do that, but only if you want to. No pressure... But... thank you, so much, Pedri, for... for everything you've been doing for me."

I glance up to see Pedri smiling a bit. "No problem, Ember."