Avengers Texts

The One Where Clint Saves The Day (As Usual)

"Uh, hey," Clint stuck his head around the corner from the kitchen and into the living room, where Tony and Steve were conversating.

"Hey, Clint. What's up?" Tony smiled. Steve glanced at Clint nervously.

"I was just curious... Cos I think I know why everyone's mad, but I wanna make sure," Steve was shaking his head fervently, but Clint ignored him and continued. "Bucky's... Like Bruce, right?"

"What do you mean?" Tony scoffed, glancing between Steve, who had gone sickly pale, and Clint, who was preparing to run. "Wait. Wait, no. No, no no. Bucky's not..."

"Tony..." Steve started. Tony jumped up and gave Steve a wide-eyed look of anger and disbelief.

"You jackass! Why the fuck would you do that?!"

"So that's a yes," Clint muttered, returning to his phone to text Sam.

"It's not as simple as you're making it sound!"

"Oh, it's not? Because it sounds like you outed Bucky as trans and then you knew I would be pissed so you didn't tell me! Is that what happened?!"

"I... Uh..."

"How could you do that?! And how could you- You know! I told you specifically I would never do something like that and I didn't even know what it was about! That's how shitty it is, it's so shitty, that me, the shittiest person in the tower, wouldn't even do it! But mister morals did! Captain RIghteous outed his supposed best friend!"

"Captain Righteous? That's funny, coming from the man who owns half the city!"

"What does that have to do with anything!?"

"Your idea of morality is making weapons and profiting from the patents."

At this point, Steve stood up and Sam had edged around the staircase to witness a fight Clint that had texted him would be 'like armageddon and world war 6 had a shitty baby'. (That described a lot of their fights, to be fair.)

"Weapons you use to kill people for puppetmaster Fury, Cap," Tony stepped to Steve. "You act like you're so much better-"

"I do not! I never-"

"-Entitled, God-complex having-"

"-Have no right to call me entitled, Stark-"

"-Got his demented war profiting hand right up your righteous, mister perfect ass-"

"-WAR PROFITING?! Like you have any room-"

"-Plenty of room since I wasn't the one doing-"

"-You're still doing it! Selling your shit to Fury-"

"-Selling it to him so YOU can use it and kill whoever he wants without asking questions, right? Like a good little spy? Shoot people and steal things-"

"-I don't kill innocent people-"

"-Of course you do! That's what America's all about you blind ass-"

"-And it's not like I don't ask questions-"

"-Inconsiderate and think you can dictate what people-"

"-I do not-"

"-You always-"

"-How dare you?!"

"Enough!" Tony hollered, loud enough that Bruce walked out of the lab followed by a quiet Natasha. They stopped next to Sam at the foot of the stairs, and Clint edged out from the kitchen, agape. "It doesn't matter. None of this shit matters. That's not what this is about. It's not about all the other shit you're gonna bring up to distract me from what we're fighting about. This is a lot simpler than me making weapons for Fury or you being a puppet to the highest bidder," he jabbed Steve in the chest, ignoring how it hurt his finger because the man was rock-fucking-solid, "It's about you being a shitty friend. Because you always have to be in control, don't you? Always need to be the hero, always have to be right and righteous and the golden boy. Well you're not. You fucked up. You had no right. And then you lied to me about it? Really?"