<Tony>
hey where the fuck are you and steve i have a party at nine and i need to finish moving all this shit so i can load the tea onto the yacht
<Bruce>
steve is in dc bc its the fourth of july and hes captain AMERICA
im trying to synthesize genomes
and please, please, PLEASE tell me ur not planning on dumping tea into the ocean
<Tony>
its not just tea, its $2 billion dollars worth of the best british imported tea you can buy
and damn fucking right im dumping it
<Bruce>
have the suits move everything for u
<Tony>
i AMMMMMMM but i wanted to take a nap and i dont trust JARVIS not to kill me by moving everything
<Bruce>
whatever
<Tony>
how long's steve gonna be in dc?
<Bruce>
well he gives his speech at six
i dont think he'll stay after that though
<Tony>
yeah. fireworks trigger bad things for him.
inconsiderate assholes putting captain america on blast
<Bruce>
cool down champ
<Tony>
oh, its fine now
i made sure that everywhere within a two hundred mile radius of the house wouldnt set off fireworks
<Bruce>
a bit extreme
and it doesnt matter he probably wont come to your party
<Tony>
but he said he would
and its not extreme you havent seen him flip out its surreal
and i dont like dealing with emotions
so i took care of it
<Bruce>
ur sweet
he might be busy tone hes captain america and its independence day
its like HIS DAY
<Tony>
yeah i get you
finish ur cloning
<Bruce>
nobody said anything about that
<Tony>
im smart too yaknow i know why you would be 'synthesizing genomes'
<Bruce>
dont tell fury
<Tony>
only if you dont tell him about my party
<Bruce>
deal
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Avengers Texts
FanfictionSomeone gave Thor a phone (it was Tony) Steve learned how to use Apple Maria Hill is a fangirl Phil Coulson is also fangirl Pepper Potts is the queen of Stark Tower (it says so in the deed to the building) Fury hates everyone (Mostly Tony) Loki is h...
