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Seonghwa didn't want to believe what he just got told, he had to check himself. As he approached the locked door, Hongjoong slid out of the way while rolling his eyes. Seonghwa pulled the handle a couple of times, looked through the lock hole to see Yunho and San there, looking back. "Yunho, open the door, please," Seonghwa asked patiently.

"No" his eldest gave back, not really caring or the probably following consequences.

"Baby, please open the door. Now"

"No! Not before you and Daddy talk and love each other again!" San protested on the other side.

At the words of their son, both parents shot each other a shocked look. Seonghwa quickly turned back to the door, continuing to convince them. "San, honey, Dad, and I love each other, everything is fine. Why would you think that?"

"Liar! If you loved each other you wouldn't behave like you do" he replied and you could hear him stamp away, down the stairs.

"San is right... I will open the door again when you get along again... Papa, don't worry, I will take good care of my brothers tonight!" Yunho said before he too went down the stairs, not giving Seonghwa the chance to protest. He leant his head against the door, sighing deeply. Oh, someone come and get him out of this world. Seonghwa took a deep breath and put himself together. There was sure a way out of this but he had to get dressed first. When he stood at the bed, he looked at Hongjoong, waiting for him to turn around.

"What?" he asked, confused about why he was getting glared at again. His husband just lifted his brow, made a silent gesture with his hand. And then, Hongjoong understood. "Wait, seriously?" he scoffed when Seonghwa didn't change his glares, so he turned around, massaging his nose bridge in annoyance. For him, this was oh so useless as in ten years there really wasn't a thing about his husband's body he didn't know.

Seonghwa opened his robe and placed it on the bed, exchanging places with his underwear. As he was pulling up the clothing he saw himself in the big mirror to his right. For the moment he got distracted by what he saw. A swollen face, a chubby tummy and the light stretchmarks flashing through his tan skin. There was one rule Seonghwa never broke because of obvious reasons. He avoided mirrors while changing at all costs. He had actually become used to it that he unconsciously just blent out the tall mirror in their room, but today it just caught his eye.

Seonghwa had a dark past with his body, he had always struggled with shaming and bullying. To this day he was marked with a scar deep down that reminded him od his past self. Hereby, sometimes looking at his bare body in the mirror, unlocked something dark and old inside him. Now seeing it again, especially in that emotional state he was in, made him want to throw up. And he was about to.

Hongjoong grew inpatient. "Why are you tak-" said as he turned around, just to catch Seonghwa running back into the bathroom. He followed him running, arriving as he was bent over the toilet vomit whatever he had eaten in the past hours. He kneeled down too, stroking his back while holding him, he looked like he could collapse every moment. This continued for a whole five minutes and then the throwing up sounds were replaced by quiet crying.
"It's okay..." Hongjoong comforted him, hesitantly hugging his back. "It's fine, Hwa"

"No it's not!" he cried out "Nothing here is fine, stop it!" Seonghwa turned to full on crying again, it felt so relieving for him. He didn't even know why on earth he had to cry in that very moment but he couldn't stop it either.

Sighing deeply, Hongjoong tried reaching Seonghwa again "Come on let me clean you up and dress you, you will get sick like that" Hongjoong sweet talked, carefully helping Seonghwa on his feet. He guided him to the sink, washed his face and mouth, walked to their bed and got him dressed while he continued to softly cry. With every sob another piece of his heart broke. He sat him down on the bed, fearing having him stand a little longer would end in hims breaking down. 

"I'm so sorry" Seonghwa whimpered out of nowhere and looked up a his beloved husband. He hadn't seen that face that close in too long. "I just can't help it... I can't! I have no problem that you want to go out with your friends but-" he grabbed Hongjoong's hands, staring at his open palms, how his tears filled them "... I can't trust you with a bunch of single men and alcohol... I'm so sorry, I tried, I'm trying but then I get so mad because - because... I don't want you to meet someone better" he cried, his face already puffy and red as the tears continuously flowed down his cheeks.

Without him noticing, salty droplets had formed in  Hongjoong's eyes. "What are you saying? There is nothing that could even reach you, please don't say something like that again!" Hongjoong replied, his whole heart falling apart. "You... You made me the person I am, Seonghwa, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you... You're all I ever-..." Hongjoong cut himself off and knelt down in front of him, his eyes now just was red. He hugged him tight, resting his head above his beating heart. "I could never... Never"

"I'm so sorry!" he cried out loud, burying his fingers into his shoulders, hiding his face. 

"Stop... Stop apologizing, please!" Hongjoong returned, pressing him closer to his own body. "You don't have to be sorry for nothing, please... stop apologizing" he added, voice now much calmer. "I... I know I shouldn't have done that spontaneously. It's always the same, we meet, his friends join, they make jokes about getting married too early and i give in, just like you always say... Stop apologizing, I did you wrong, Hwa... I'm sorry"   

~

"Should we open the door now?"

"I can still hear them crying..."

"Did we make it worse?" 

"I don't think so"

"Why?"

"Dada shad i yuf yu!"



-

Hey, how are you?

so, if someone sees wattpad burning, it wasn't me and totally not because that bxtch is bugging again. 

I can't open all the comments from the last chapter and it's pissing me off. Since last night I'm trying to fix it and the shitty Help&Support Center didn't help either-.-

The last time this happened Wattpad deleted all my drafts and published stories so if this ever disappears out of the blue, yeah, I'm at their door fighting a bxtch :) Once, Watty, not twice ;)

Anyways,

Please stay healthy and safe!

-gulkurusubb

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