If Ever (COMPLETED - EDITING)

Chapter 15 - Kai

Kai

I chugged a whole bottle of beer and sighed, finally I said. "I needed that."

"Seven months I've seen her come in and sit on the same chair, every week. For 7 months, I sat across from her. I said nothing because I didn't know what to say. Hadn't known who this girl was. I didn't even know her name, because she never spoke."

"You can't force people to share. They have to be able to want to do it, see. No matter what Jane says or how much she encourages us."

"She'd come in, knees pulled in, bag at her feet, hair in a messy bun or a curtain like sheet, hiding her face. But when I would be able to take a peek or got a single glimpse, her face was dead. There was nothing there. Her eyes were glass, she never looked at anyone, she didn't speak. It was like she wasn't living. Like she was a beautiful ghost that just existed and hovered in the room.

She never even looked up to see me or the guy next to her. She just dug a hole in her shoe."

"Yeah, I've seen it, but she refuses to change it." Owen said. I thought it was cute, the rattiness of her at school.

"We went to the same school, though I'm a year ahead, we have almost all the same classes and every day I thought she would look up but she didn't. I can't tell you why it bothered me. But it did.

I wondered what had happened to her for her to be this way. She looked like a fucking corpse just drifting through life."

I look another swig; a darkness had clouded Owen's eyes as well. He chugged down his own beer.

"We tried you know, Mel especially. Everything and anything, she was just the same. For months now since the fire, she's been screaming bloody murder in her sleep and there is nothing we can do to help her or calm her. She won't let us touch her, she just screams more if we get close." 

He looked close to tears. I didn't blame him. Fuck! How had this happened to Ella. What had happened to her? But I had touched her, I had stopped it. She had let me do it. Part of me was so happy I was able to get through to her.

"It's a fucking miracle she let's me hug her now, she thinks I don't realise, but I know. She still won't let Mel and it's even crazier she let's you carry her and touch her." He shook his head. I was so terrified to ask what had really happened to her.

"Mel told me you stopped her night terror?" He looked at me eyes wide. I nodded. "I didn't know she had them. But yeah, she let me sort her out." I said. Equally baffled. He looked stunned. 

"She screams let me out." He said, tears flowed from his face. He wiped them roughly. I froze. What? What the hell did that mean? Let her out of where? Oh God.

"Months after the silent weeping and sobbing stopped, she just became silent. A quietness settled over her, and I think we completely lost her then. She didn't interact, she said nothing, she didn't or couldn't communicate. The silence was worse than the screaming. She didn't say a word to us for 7 months, not a single word. She did become a ghost. The first time she spoke to us was that night after group. I think I had almost forgotten what she sounded like. It was also the first time she let me hug her." Owen's eyes were watery again. Jesus. I could only imagine living with her like that, without hearing her laugh or that smile that shown like the sun. Or listening to her quick quippy comments.

I shook my head. Fuck. We drank some more.

"Finally, a guy from group, walked up to her one day and started talking with her and it pissed me the fuck off, why hadn't I been the one to ask her to a cup of coffee. But Troy, was harmless so I figured it was better this way, maybe she would make a friend. Maybe he would get her to open up."