The Choice (a Painful Past)

56

That hurt. I had been called that my entire life, as an insult, so it bothered me that he would use it. I just didn't like to do anything bad, because bad things happened.

"Can't you ever just get over yourself and have a little fun? Maybe you should try some. Might help you loosen up and not be such a prude. Justin is a good guy, and a good friend. You just told him to get out of your house. That was rude, Cal. If you keep treating people like that, no one is going to want to be around you. I'm just saying." He shrugged.

I felt like shit. Maybe he was right. It wasn't like they had Crack pipes or needles in my house.

It was just a little powder and he kept it in the bathroom, not out in the open. I didn't want it, and I didn't want Will to do it, but what other people did wasn't my concern. I didn't want everyone thinking I was a bitch.

"Fine." I caved. "I'll go apologize and tell him he can stay, but he's got to, at least, keep it in the bathroom and out of sight."

He smiled at me, softly, and I felt warmth spread from the tips of my toes to the top of my head. "That's my girl." He replied, pulling me in for a tight hug.

I rested my head on his shoulder and kissed his neck. He let out a deep growl and pulled me closer.

"I can't wait for tonight." He whispered, before he nipped my neck with his teeth.

I yelped and giggled. I was ready for this. I was tired of waiting. I missed being with him.

He took my hand and led me into the kitchen, where a new group of people were playing Bones.

"What do you want to drink? Everyone brought something, so it's kind of like a community chest of drinks over here. We got 4 different kinds of vodka, tequila, cheap tequila, Jack, Crown, Lord Calvert, wine coolers, different flavors of Smirnoff and Puckers. There's even a few Mad Dogs." He said, holding his arms out to the vast assortment of alcohol on my kitchen counter.

"Um." I replied, hesitantly.

There were too many choices.

"Here, just let me make you something. You don't really drink, so something fruity. Hmm." He said, looking at the drinks.

There were a lot of different kinds of two liters shuffled through the alcohol too. Chasers. There was Coca-Cola, Dr. Pepper, Sprite, Mountain Dew, Pepsi, and more.

He opened the fridge and I saw a couple gallons of orange juice, a little pomegranate juice, grape juice, and fruit punch.

"Maybe something simple. How about a Screwdriver?" He asked.

"I guess." I replied.

I knew that I liked the orange juice and vodka drink, but only if the vodka wasn't too strong. When I got drunk, I wouldn't care, but when I first started for the night, I couldn't stomach the taste of alcohol. He made my drink and passed it to me.

I took a sip and cringed just a little. I could taste the vodka, but it wasn't too strong. I could manage and I didn't have to work the next morning, so I could get blacked out, if I wanted.

"Okay, I'm gonna go find Dusty and burn this." He said, pulling a huge blunt out from behind his ear.

I hadn't even noticed that it was there.

"You wanna come?"

I shook my head. I couldn't drink and smoke at the same time. That spelled extreme vomiting for me.

"No, I'm good. You go ahead." I said.

He smiled and leaned over to press his soft lips to mine for a moment.

"Have fun." He said, before he turned and started pushing through the crowded house.

I walked around, looking for people that I knew well enough to talk to. I made my way outside, and looked up at the sky. The moon was crescent shaped, shining brightly above me, with stars littering the inky, dark blue sky.

I sighed and felt the stress leave my body. The night sky always relaxed me, even with the blaring music and the large amount of people taking up my yard. I found a quiet place near the side of the house and sat down on the bench that was up against the wall.

I pulled out my phone and texted Sherri, to see if she was here. I didn't have it in me to just keep searching through all of these people. After I took a few large gulps of my drink, I decided to text Colby too.

I didn't care if Will didn't want him here. I wanted him here.

"Hey Colby. I forgot to tell you that we were having a party at my house tonight, if you want to ride by. You can bring your friends, too. There are tons of people here." I hit send and thought about how I would feel, if he showed up with that girl that I had seen in the picture.

I wasn't sure why it made my stomach clench in a bad way, but I didn't like it.

"Hey, yeah, we're over by the fire barrel! Where are you?" Sherri texted back.

"On my way." I replied.

I stood and stretched my sore body, then walked around the house, towards the fire barrel. When I got closer, I could see Sherri's platinum hair shining in the light of the fire.

"Calliiiieeee." She squealed, when she saw me.

I laughed and met her halfway to hug her tightly.

"Oh my God, it feels like it's been forever!" She exclaimed.

"I think it has been." I replied. "Like a couple of months or something."

"God, really? Time just flies by when you have to adult. I don't like it. Can we just go back to grade school?" She said, grimacing.

I laughed.

"I wish. We're stuck here now. They tricked us. Adulting is bullshit."

"Oh, facts." She said, with a smile. "So, how have you been? You and Will doing okay now?"

"Yeah, I guess so. We never really talked about anything, because I just didn't wanna relive it. We're good though. Anyway, how are you and Shawn?" I waved to him, where he stood a few feet away, with his eyes on Sherri.

He smiled and waved back.

"Oh, we're better. I mean, I had to explain to him why watching porn felt like cheating to me, but he understood and we're better. I hate living with his mom though. I love her, but she annoys the fuck out of me." She said quietly, shaking her head.

"I can imagine." I replied.

"Hold on, I'll be right back." She said, before she ran back to Shawn and whispered something to him.

He nodded and kissed her, then she ran back to me.