The Choice (a Painful Past)

149

I froze immediately. I didn't want to talk about Will. Every time I glanced to the other side of the springs and saw that stupid tree, I thought about him.

Every day of my life, I thought about him.

"We don't have to talk about this, and we can pretend like I never said anything, but I want you to know that I'm here if you ever need me, Cal. If you ever want to talk about it, I'll listen. I can't promise that I won't try to kill him, though. I owe him one anyway." He continued.

I forced a smile and met his gaze.

"You're right. I've been through some shit, and I know that I haven't explained a lot of it to you. I don't know if I ever will. I don't want to talk about it." I replied, softly, wincing as some of the memories passed through my mind.

"Okay. I get it. I just wanted you to know that I'm here for you." He replied, gently.

I nodded and turned my attention back to my plate. I looked at the almost untouched food and reached down to grab a handful of grapes. We fell silent again, as we finished our food and drinks.

I set my empty can of peach Nehi down and smiled.

"This was our favorite drink." I said, looking up at him.

"Yeah, I know." He said, returning the smile. "I actually couldn't find it anywhere, until I lucked up on it online. I bought a shit load of it. It doesn't taste as good as I remember though."

I laughed and shook my head. "It definitely doesn't. Maybe it's just our taste buds maturing."

"Maybe." He laughed, as he grabbed a bottle of cold water and chugged it. "That aftertaste is something else."

I built my last cheese, cracker, and meat snack, and started to eat it. I had cleaned my plate after all.

"Did you want some of this chocolate?" He asked, pushing the plate of delicately designed chocolates towards me.

I stared at them for a moment, desperately wanting some, but I shook my head.

"No." I sighed. "Thank you though. I'm trying to cut back on my sugar intake."

"Okay, I get that. I cut back on a lot of unhealthy things a little while back. It didn't stick though. I just travel too much. It's hard to eat healthy, when you're on the road and there are more McDonald's than there is anything else." He chuckled.

"I can only imagine." I replied. "I've barely been more than 50 miles from this city in my entire life. Wait, that's not right. I went to Florida on a family vacation, when I was 16."

"Damn." He replied. "I remember that. I missed you for that entire week."

I laughed. "Yeah, I could tell by the hundred texts that I got from you every day. Will wasn't very happy about that." I realized what I had said, and closed my mouth, letting my laughter fade.

Colby stayed silent for a few moments, before he changed the subject.

"If you could go anywhere, where would you go?" He asked.

"In the world, or in the U.S.?" I responded.

He shrugged.

"Both."

"Well...I've always wanted to go to Ireland. That's like my dream spot. There's just something about that place that pulls me there. In the states...hmmm. That's harder. Maybe to the mountains, somewhere. A place where I can get lost in the peace of it all." I replied, dreamily, as I looked up at the sky.

"Ireland is an amazing place. I've been there." He replied.

I could see him smiling at me out of the corner of my eyes.

"Really?" I asked. "When did you go? What was it like?"

I could see the rolling green hills in my mind's eye, just sloping up and down in the mist that covered the green lands, with white sheep grazing lazily nearby.

"It was like two different worlds. Dublin was the busy city life, with amazing architecture and history, while the countryside was calm and peaceful. Both were beautiful in different ways. I preferred the countryside though, unless I wanted to party. There was just something about it that made me feel at ease. I wish you could've seen it. We went last year, actually. We did a haunted video about one of the hotels in Dublin and an actual castle in the countryside." He replied.

"Wow." I sighed, imagining what it must have been like.

The bright city lights twinkling, as he walked down the sidewalk in town, surrounded by the natives talking, with that beautiful accent that I adored.

"How about I take you one day?" He suggested.

My eyes shot to his in surprise.

"Wha?" I asked, dumbfounded.

"Yeah, we'll end up going back eventually, so we wouldn't be making a special trip or anything. I know how you are about those types of things. You could just go with us." He replied.

I shook my head.

"Colby, I don't have money for things like that. Plus, I have Ben and Mom to look out for. Thank you, but it's just not possible."

"Those are things that could be worked out, and you know that I don't mind helping you pay for anything." He responded.

I shook my head again.

"Okay...but the offer is on the table. I'll help you figure things out, if you change your mind." He finished.

"Thanks." I replied, again.

We spent the rest of the afternoon walking around the springs and reminiscing on our high school days. It was a lot of fun. I felt happier than I had in a very long time.

Lighter, like the weight of the world had lessened on my shoulders.

"We should probably get going." Colby sighed, after he checked the time on his phone.

I realized that neither of us had even looked at our phones all day.

"Shit." I whispered, as I dug mine out of my purse.

"What's up?" He asked.

"My phone is on silent and I forgot to change it. I have to make sure that Mom or B didn't need me." I replied, impatiently. "Where the fuck is my phone?"

I dug around in the purse, but it was like it was bottomless. The more I dug, it seemed to just get deeper, with no phone becoming available.

"Hey, calm down. I'm sure everything is fine. Let me help you look." He said, soothingly, as he took my purse from me. "Do you mind?" He asked.

I shook my head and motioned for him to go ahead. There wasn't anything super personal in there.

"Let's sit here until we find it, okay?" He suggested, motioning his head towards one of the white stone benches nearby.

I sighed and ran my fingers roughly through my hair, as I followed him over to it. We sat and he began to pull everything out of my purse and set it gently on the ground. It only took a minute before I saw him pull out my phone.

I snatched it up and threw my arms around his neck, gratefully.

"Oh, thank you, thank you!" I exclaimed, as I buried my face in his neck.

God he smelled good. His strong arms tightened around my waist, pulling me tighter against him. Since we were both sitting down, I was leaning halfway over his lap, while we hugged.

It was a little uncomfortable, but I didn't mind. It felt safe here. Nice and warm, in his arms.

Like I imagined Ireland would be.