Your UnSlut Project

Submitted by @shynessofme

It all started when I was born prematurely approximately three months early. Due to being born so early, I was bound to have medical problems. They weren't surprised to find out I had mild Cerebral Palsy (or CP for short) and that I was sight impaired, deeming me legally blind, although I am not fully blind.

Due to these medical problems, I had seven eye surgeries and one heart surgery all in the range of just days old to my second birthday, and I could not walk until I was about that age (two). I had to, even then, use a walker and go to physical and occupational therapy once a week.

As I grew older, I was given daytime braces for my legs. I still couldn't walk very well going into Kindergarten, so they made me wait a year to start school at the age of seven instead of six, going into school in the same grade as my sister. When I did start school, it was nice because mostly everybody wasn't stereotyping others, and nobody thought of me as different because of my leg problems, although I did get pushed around and bullied a bit. So yes, I got my first official bully in Kindergarten.

First through third grade, however, people started noticing how different I walked and that I wore braces on my feet. I started to be left out of a bunch of social actives (kickball was the real deal back then, haha) and nobody really wanted to befriend me. Due to this, I became really reserved and shy. I did meet a girl that I'll call Daisy, and she became my best friend. She overlooked my disabilities, and made me feel a lot better about myself.

I decided going into fifth grade I would tell my doctor I wanted nighttime braces instead of daytime ones, thinking that I might be able to fit in and not have bullies and that everyone would forget I had leg problems like the snap of my finger. I was wrong. I started wearing things only like sweatshirts and sweat outfits, and started to wear athletic type stuff. This, I realized later, would become yet another reason for me to be bullied. People started to think I was even weirder than they already thought that I was. It's a horrible thing, really.

This was also the time I realized people were bullying me not just to my face, but behind my back. I remember a time when my sister had told me one time she was in class in fifth grade when someone had picked up my scissors and someone had said to the person, "Eww! Don't touch those! Those are ________!" Going into middle school, I thought of it as a fresh start. I still wore the same kind of thing I had worn in fifth grade. However, I told myself I would try to make new friends and fit in. I did make new friends, but I was still labeled as weird and a outcast and set to never fit in. Ladies and gentleman, middle school is where all the drama really started to take place. Keep that in mind.

I had gym my sixth grade year for twelve weeks. This is where people started to realize (the people who had never gone to my elementary school) that I had some sort of leg problem. We had to do "warm ups" (stuff like running back and forth, doing the karaoke, skipping, hopping, etc.) every single day in front of the entire gym class with your gender (mine was girls) while the boys, in my case, watched. It was very noticeable that I had some sort of problem, as EVERY single time, I would always be the last girl to finish running, or, really, doing any time of activity. Because of this, people apparently assumed that if you have a leg problem like mine, or some type of physical disability, that you're stupid. (I had straight A's then, and I still do, I guess they never got to really know me.) So people started talking to me like I was stupid, and they started to befriend me because they felt bad for me. To this day, people still do. It was always noticeable when they did, because they acted different.

Anyway, around the middle of that year I developed a crush on a guy that happened to be the most popular guy in sixth grade. He was athletic, good looking (at least to me), very kind, and very smart. We were friends, but at that time I wish I had realized he had only befriended me because he felt bad for me. He knew I liked him. My sister even told me he told her he knew because they were talking about all of the girls that had liked him. (So yeah, he basically was that cliché guy that all the girls had liked.) I do know, however, that it was really obvious I liked him because I would literally get panic attacks just trying to talk to him. I'll call him Dean. Although Dean didn't like me back, he was still very nice to me. Dean is kind of important character that you should know about.