Submitted by @Gayjin99

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Before I even begin to explain my past predicament, you need to understand that I am a gay, cisgender male. (Bear in mind that I'm 16 and a half now, and so nothing occurring here is illegal. I will also say that, while sexual freedom should be encouraged, you must obey the law of where you live.)

So, my last relationship - in person, by the way - lasted about 4-5 months. About a fortnight before we broke up, my boyfriend had asked for some "gratification", to which I kindly obliged. I shan't include any details, but let's just say that I thought I had myself a winner (XD).

A day or two after that night, I became swamped in DMs over Twitter; Msgs on Facebook; Pics on Instagram. Centuries of messages from now blocked, then anonymous users, saying that I'm a "little whore"; that I'll "do anything for a one night stand". I was sent way too phallocentric images on all platforms, saying that my "services" were in dire need.

For each message that appeared in my notifications, I became embroiled in self-hatred. I couldn't comprehend why this hell was inflicted upon me. I went into a depressive state - I'm easily and quickly sent into these - one I'm still trying to clamber out of, with the help family and friends and my own writing alongside.

Someone mustn't have had that strong a hate for me though, as one message read as such:

"It's all where you least expect it."

This brought my thoughts to a close. I had a niggling doubt in my gut, one that said "He's no good for you", yet I had tuned this out. After this one phrase, my conscience was screaming that "IT WAS YOUR BOYFRIEND, YOU DUMB F*****!"

Needless to say, I "interrogated" him, and I got him to break. He'd spread a rumour that I had forced myself onto him, and that I was also cheating on him.

I dumped him immediately, and I'm still working out where my head is. What I took away from this is that "unslutting" is important, not just in the world of women, but also in preventing homophobic issues such as this.

I thoroughly thank you all for this chance, and for listening to me. Gayjin, out!


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