Your UnSlut Project

Submitted by @BusyBeeBiz, Author of "The Spark Theory"

'Slut.' How easily do we use this word? Just because a girl hangs out with guys she is given such a title? I also never understood this dual mentality of the society. If a guy sleeps with many girls, people praise him. He is given the title of a 'player' or a 'casanova'. But if a girl has a line of boy friends, she is labelled as a 'slut' or a 'whore'. How hypocritical.

There is one more thing I don't like about slut shaming. I don't understand why prostitutes are considered bad. I am not saying that prostitution is a great profession or anything like that. But prostitutes, too, are humans. For many of us, sex is an activity which is supposed to be enjoyed, but these women can't even do that. Many of them have to face the touch of filthy men without deriving any satisfaction for themselves. We don't know these women. We don't know how or why they landed in this field. Then how do we have the right to judge them? We sell our brains and our efforts to make money. They use their bodies. What's the difference? So why do we need to judge them when we don't even know about them?

Slut shaming and bullying a female is an infringement of women's rights.

I never faced slut shaming in my life, nor have I ever been a part of it. But I have been subjected to what I call 'virgin shaming'.

In school, I was never considered beautiful. I was the thin, ugly, flat-chested girl whose face was adorned with specs, pimples, and braces. I wasn't bullied physically. It was more of an emotional or psychological thing.

People would become friends with me only to get help in studies. I was constantly berated for my looks. Guys used to give me weird looks. The prettier girls looked down on me. There was a lot of name calling, too. Sometimes I was made fun of on the basis of my appearance. They made fun of my name as well, because it was different from the common names in my class. Some felt sorry for me that I couldn't even get a boyfriend for myself.

I clearly remember that a guy had once rated me three out of ten for looks. He told me 'I am sorry, but that's the max I could give you.' He wasn't even good looking! I just smiled in return.

I pretended to ignore them, pretended that their words didn't matter to me. But it did. My behavior in school was normal but at home, I was different. I used to get angry easily and would start fighting with my mom. I used to cry for hours, thinking, why I couldn't look good, or why couldn't a guy like me. It hurt badly.

My best friend since sixth grade dumped me in ninth because she didn't have any use for me. She was getting the attention from various guys and hanging out with a loser like me was of no use. The betrayal hurt more than anything. I kept crying and wallowing for hours in self pity.

In tenth grade, it got worse. The taunts continued. Girls used to give me weird looks during the P.E. (physical education) period. Teachers didn't favor me. My depression had reached its peak.

I started studying like crazy. I withdrew in a shell and stopped talking altogether. I realized that I could never get the peer acceptance I craved. This made me jump further in the sea of books.

My mom couldn't see me like that anymore. I had to undergo psychiatric counselling. My mind came back to its senses and I became normal again.

I wanted to tell this story because I could never understand what the world wanted from us. If we don't have a boyfriend or are virgins, they insult us. If we date a stream of boys, we are called sluts. The labelling will never stop.

Today, I am more confident of myself than ever before. I am no longer considered ugly. Some people have even called me beautiful. So basically, it's all up to us. Whether we let the world affect us or we tell them to 'f*ck it' and make a mark for ourselves.

Biz is an eighteen year old currently in medical school preparing to be a dentist. She loves meeting new people, reading, acting, and food!