Your UnSlut Project

Submitted by @madesimple_

I bullied.

My reason? Because I was bored and felt like stirring someone up.

I was on Facebook, scrolling through my news feed when I saw a girl post a status about her fish dying, we’ll call her Anne. I said something really cruel…

"I wish you were that fish, bitch"

Anne was a quiet and shy girl in school and she just stuck to herself. She didn’t have many friends, but the friends she did have, she didn’t hang around them much. She was book smart and had a really good future ahead of herself. She had a sense of style and she always wore her hair down in soft curls.

What I loathed about her was that she always seemed strong when she needed to be. She would stick up for herself when people would bully her or she would just ignore them. She didn’t let the bullies get to her. She never let anyone break her.

Now I know what you’re thinking but I just want to say that I really really wish I could go back and tell myself that it was a really stupid thing to say and I should have just left her alone. I know now that there is nothing I can do to change that and that I’m just going to have live with myself. I didn’t think about my actions and I’m so angry with myself.

A few months later my friends were talking about how Anne had committed suicide because she was sick of being treated unfairly. She was sick of feeling like nothing.

They said that her death letter said a few things about how she couldn’t take the death threats anymore and the bullying and everything else anymore. She couldn’t stand being called a loser and a nobody. But the worse thing was that she started to hate herself for listening and agreeing with what everyone was calling her. She was mad with herself.

We broke her. I couldn’t believe it. The feeling of knowing that your words led someone to committing suicide… I can’t explain the feeling. It's a whirl of different emotions. You really don’t know how to feel but you know how to label yourself.

Murderer.

I took someone's life and I had no right. I bullied her because ‘I got bored one night’. How pathetic is that? I took away a young life. I took away a daughter, a sister, a friend, a niece, an aunt and a future wife. I took away an innocent person's life who didn’t deserve to die. She was born to be somebody. She was born to live her life and I took those opportunities away from her.

Who am I? I am no one. What gives me the right to take away her life? Nothing. I have to live every single day knowing I murdered her. I might as well have taken that rope and tied it around her neck myself.

The message that I am trying to get across to everyone is that you don’t know what the effect of bullying is until it’s too late. How I feel is beyond rage with myself. How could I let myself stoop so low that I had to make a witty comment about her dying? I do not wish my situation on anyone and I am trying to put a stop to it. I do not wish anyone to be a murderer when that’s not what they intended. WORDS CAN KILL.