Your UnSlut Project

Submitted by @Idiot-Alert

Some people may consider slut shaming to only affect the victim. Let me tell you now, it doesn't. Imagine being called a murderer, a killer, for something that you didn't intend to go so far. Think about those people who grow up with the guilt of making someone's life miserable. I didn't physically say the words, I didn't tell that person how I felt, and I still feel horrible about it.

It happened when I was about 10, and had just gotten the app 'Kik.' I was a quite naive about the Internet and such, especially when accepting chat requests. One day this new request popped up, and I accepted it without thinking. It was fun to occupy myself with talking to other people, avoiding the topic of where I lived and my number and things.

We talked for a while, I don't remember if I said I was a girl, but I don't think so. She told me she was, and then said something along the lines of "I'm so hungry." I was 10, and totally innocent. I didn't know how to deal with it when I received a nearly nude picture of somebody, I don't know if it was 'her' or not. After two more of them, I quickly went out and deleted the app.

This freaked me out a lot, so I didn't tell my parents about it. I used words against that person that I'd read in books that were too old for me to be reading, and, only understanding the vague gist of them, started calling this person a slut and a whore. I actually developed trichotillomania (I think that's how you spell it) because of it, where you pull out hair because of stress, something that I still deal with now, three years later.

Back on topic, though, this continued until sometime last year, me thinking back to it at points and believing that person to be despicable. It was actually only when I started reading 'Your UnSlut Project' that I fully realized the extent of the words I had been repeating over and over. I began to understand what people felt like because of them, and I felt horrible for calling someone them.

Anyway, my point is, the people doing the bullying are as much a part of the story as the victim, and they have to feel that regret for the rest of their lives. I still haven't told my parents, I might not ever tell them, but at least this book helped me to realize what I was doing. It helped me more than they could have, than anyone else could have, so thanks Emily, for starting this story, and to everyone else who wrote down their own encounters with slut shaming.