Your UnSlut Project

Submitted by @TheUltimateFatMan, Author of "Hilariously Useless Facts"

My life hasn't always been as complicated as I make it out to be. But sometimes, there are things in my life that are just that, complicated.

I must confess now I am a Genophobic. For those who aren't familiar with the term, "Genophobia is the Physical or Psychological fear of sexual relations or sexual intercourse". Now you're probably wondering why I'm telling you this and what it has to do with slut shaming. Well, I get very uncomfortable talking about sex with other people. It makes me extremely panicked and nervous. When someone tries to bring the subject into the conversation I immediately tell them when I'm uncomfortable and that I don't wish to talk about this stuff with them.

Now the incidents (it happened more than once) of slut shaming that I encountered began with this subject, "sex". The person I was talking with was a girl. She was talking about what "turns her on", and former sexual partners. I felt really nervous, shaky, and unnerved by the direction of the conversation. Just thinking about it now makes me nervous.

Anyways, I told the girl that I didn't want to talk about this stuff, and that she was making me uncomfortable and that If she wanted to talk to someone else about this stuff that was cool but with me it was just not gonna happen.

Now the immediate reaction I received shocked me. She instantly was on the defensive, saying, "Wow you made me feel like a slut. Thanks for slut shaming me." I was stunned and confused. I didn't understand. I plainly said it simply made me uncomfortable. But for some reason, this meant that I was shaming her for her sexuality. Which was not the case at all.

It spiraled into a total attack on my character. I went from the person she felt comfortable enough to talk to about intimate details of her personal life, to being a slut shaming, evil bully. After a while of talking and apologizing for the "appearance" of slut shaming, I managed to get her to see things from my perspective.

I've never slut shamed anyone in my life. But even though I was the accused "shamer", I felt like the victim. Because of my gender, I wasn't allowed to be honest about how I felt about talking about sex with a girl. That was one incident, and it happened again, in the same fashion. After the second time I felt like I had to be quiet, talk about something that I don't feel comfortable talking about, and suffer a panic attack from the anxiety in the process.

So who was the victim in these situations? I don't know. All I know is I can't live my life, constantly sacrificing my mind and my personal feelings to make others comfortable with themselves.