Contemplation

Friends>Lovers

The thought of seeing him again makes my heart plummet

I hurt him and I didn't mean too

A childhood friend who I couldn't love no matter how he loved me

I wanted to apologize

I didn't want too lose him as a friend

but I fear its too late

as he doesn't talk to me

as he avoids me

I gnaw at my nails and bounce my legs

I want to scream I'm sorry

but the truth is I have said it more times than I probably should have

and actions speak louder than words

but how do I show that I didn't mean for this to happen that I still care even if its not in the same way

I'm beating myself up over this but there is nothing that I can do besides wish that you would love someone and not me who doesn't know if she can ever love.