Survive [Larry Stylinson]

Chapter 16.

"What?"

"You heard me. What are you taking medication for? And why are you seeing a doctor? Tell me."

This is surely the first time I am this stubborn and frustrated with Louis. I'm just so sick and tired of people keeping secrets from me. People have treated me like this all my life. Just cause i've been struggling with self harm through the years everyone just assume that they can't tell me serious things, cause they're afraid i'll get upset and hurt myself. But it's not like that. It's never like that. I'm just done with this. I am tired of all the lies.

All the years I knew my sister I never knew how miserable she truly was. Cause she never told me. We were the only kids in our family so she always tried to be the strong one. She always smiled and she was always so happy around us. How would I have known that her boyfriend abused her? How would I have known that she got drunk every weekend? If I had only been stronger she would have trusted me with these things. She would have told me about her terrible boyfriend. She would have told me she was going to a party the 4th of Februari. She would have told me and maybe then... She would still be here. She would still be alive. And Chad wouldn't have cut us off either. They were so close. Chad was my sisters best friend. To be honest I think he always had kind of a crush on her as well... He was always at our home and mother always told Gemma what a great guy Chad seemed to be. But as soon as Gemma died Chad kind of disappeared. I guess he's still in England somewhere. Wandering the streets on his own. I really hope he's okay though. 

"Harry are you even listening?"

Louis voice brings me back into reality. I blink and realize that he's been talking for the last minute and that he's now sitting on the bed in front of me.

"I'm sorry I was kind of thinking about something..."

I admit and look down at the carpet. Louis sighs and stands up from the bed. He places his hands on my shoulders and tries to have eye contact with me, even though my eyes are glued to the floor.

"Look. You have absolutely nothing to worry about. I had some difficulties with my health once, but it was ages ago. Everything is fine. I promise."

Even though his words are calming and make total sense I am still not entirely convinced. Guess it is my trust issues creeping up as usual. Louis cups my chin and brings me up to look him in the eyes.

"You're over thinking this, Harry. You usually do, about everything. You have to learn to let some things be. You can trust me. Okay?"

He adds. If he says that I can trust him, then I can. I don't know why but there is something so secure about Louis. I already felt it the first time we met. He just really seems like a guy you can tell your secrets to. Besides, he did save my life. So I owe it to him to at least trust him, right?

When we get out of the room and back to the guys we realize we weren't away as long as we thought we were. They're so concentrated on their video games that they didn't even notice us joining them. Liam is holding one controller and Zayn is holding the other. Niall is just kind of there like some kind of over excited cheerleader watching the game. Louis grabs two beers from the table and hands me one. I don't really like beer that much but after thinking so much about my sister, I really need one. Since the guys have already taken all the room on the sofa, there is only one seat left on the armchair. Louis of course sits down and I'm left standing, like the outsider I truly am.

"Styles"

Louis gentle voice calls. I turn around and see him patting his lap. Does he really want me to sit there? I'm first confused as if i've misunderstood something. Louis then palms his face in a frustrated way.