Survive [Larry Stylinson]

Chapter 42.

Patience.

There's no such thing as patience right now. Time goes by so slow here. Every passing minute feels like an hour. I sit there surrounded by empty chairs and a sign that says *Waiting room*. Doctors walk past the halls every now and then and everytime they come, I pray for them to call my name. Call my name and tell me that Louis is going to be alright. But it has been hours and I they haven't told me shit.

It was such a weird experience. Walking up those stairs not having any idea what's going on. I still have no clue, but at least now he's surrounded by proffesionals that deal with these kind of things for a living. I'm just so terrified. It was so strange to have my lover, my role model fall into my arms and not wake up. I was literally shaking when I called the ambulance. And here I am hours later, waiting for someone to tell me that he's alright.

My knees are weak as I sit there observing my surroundings. I don't like being in hospitals. I spent way to much time here as a kid. There are no decent memories of me visiting the dentist and getting a lollipop. More like body examinations, tests and not to mention all our meetings at the family-therapy.

*Flashback*

"I don't understand what's wrong with him. He stays in his room all day, he doesn't eat, he doesn't go out and he keeps hurting himself. I'm worried" I remember my mother saying as tears ran down her face. She was so naive to tell every single therapist the same thing every time and hope to come to a logical conclusion. The therapist was so callous and just nodded along, stating the obvious from time to time.

"Harry, why do you refuse to eat?" The therapist asked, and I was so bored with these meetings that I hated answering the same questions over and over again. It never lead anywhere. It was a waste of time and money.

"Because I don't want to"

"Do you think you're fat?" Here went again. Stating the obvious as usual. Before I got the chance to answer my mother went ahead and answered for me.

"Yes he does! He weighs himself all the time and he can stand in front of the mirror for ages! It's like an obsession really."

"Have you considered the possibilities for anorexia or bulimia? Cause this seems to be a case of eating disorders and depression." The therapist informed my mother, and oh how she looked confused. As if it was impossible for someone she's raised to be struggling with these sort of things.

"That't not possible, there's no reason for him to be depressed. He's only 14? His sister is older and she's always so happy, I don't understand" Well, that's what she thought.

"Maybe the father's departure took on Harry more than his sister" The therapist concluded and I just shook my head. At that point I felt nothing for my father except for hatred. I couldn't care less about him. He was definately not the reason I was depressed. But then again, I didn't quite understand myself why I was depressed at that stage. I was so young and I didn't understand the things happening to me. "You told me he has had a babysitter lately, why is that?" She asked my mother, and suddenly my stomach started turning.

"Yes, Kurt. When Gemma is at school and I have to work we need someone to keep an eye on Harry..."

"But doesn't he go to school?"

"No I don't"

---

"Harry Styles?" A male voice calls and snaps me out of my thoughts. I raise my gaze just to see a bald man with grey hair, glasses and a white robe stand right next to my angel. Louis. He's standing there with his ruffled soft hair and crinkled eyed smile. My heart swells as I rush up to them both. I run towards Louis and give him a big hug. I then realize that I'm being rude to the doctor and shake hands with him.

"I'm doctor Nelson. Nice to meet you." He says. Doctor Nelson? Isn't he the one I talked to on the phone? The one that Louis used to go to? "Louis is going to be fine, it was just a little setback from his surgery."

"Surgery? What surgery?" My worry is now turning to anger but Louis quickly tries to calm me down.

"One I had ages ago, not that important" He tries. "What's important is that I can go home now, right?" He asks and turns to the doctor. He nods. I would and I know I SHOULD ask him further questions about this but all that matters right now is that he is okay.

"Well thank you so much for your help." I say and shake hands with the doctor once more. He smiles at me and thanks me, and with that, I get take my baby home.

 The ride home is quiet and so is it when we get home. I don't dare to say anything cause it feels like anything I say can cause him to snap at me, I don't even know why. So as soon as we walk into the apartment Louis walks right towards the bedroom. I follow him. He must be as exhausted as me. Having to go to the hospital in the middle of the night. Louis doesn't even bother to undress, he just throws himself on to the bed. I, on the other hand, take my time. I go and brush my teeth, change into sleepwear and even make myself a late night snack. I hesitate for a second but I then decide to text Niall. He's the only one of the boys that can possibly be up in this unreasonable hour.

*Hi Niall. I just came home from the hospital with Louis... He's having problems and I don't know what to do... Hope you're up... H.*

I send the message and pray for a response tonight. I need someone to help me with this. Something is obviously wrong with Louis' health, but it's hard to help him when he doesn't tell me anything about it. So perhaps the boys know... I just need to know how to help him. Cause seeing Louis like this tonight really was a wake up call for me. I need to stop thinking about my own problems and health and start thinking about him as well. He looks out for me all the time in many different ways, so I should return the favor.

Suddenly I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket. A message from Niall. Thank god! I knew that he would be up.

*Helloo! Oh, is he okay? How about you join me tomorrow as I go shopping for Ellie's birthday? We can discuss this then. I'm too tired right now bro*

*Yeah he's fine... Yeah I guess so. Louis works like all day anyways. No problem bro, sleep tight.*

It feels so great that Louis' friends aren't total assholes. It honestly feels like I can rely on them at all times. Besides, Niall and I have really gotten along lately and I couldn't be more happy about it. I need to know that others actually enjoy my company.

I walk back to the bedroom to finally get some sleep. I stand for a moment and admire Louis. He sleeps so peacefully. He's just so endearing and completely breathtaking. What would I do without him? I take a deep breath and climb into bed, cuddling him. I wrap his warm torso in my arms and bury my face in his neck. I love him. I love him so much.

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4K reads! You guys are incredible! I'm so excited to share the upcoming chapters with you. Things are getting serious. That's all I'm going to say.

Love always, S.