MATED TO SERIES COLLECTION

40. LARA: A HURT SO SWEET

"Are we just going to stay like this the whole night?"

Ethan chuckled. "Yes. Do you have something else in mind?"

I sighed. "No."

Of course I had a lot of other things in mind, but I didn't voice them. I never expected us just lay on the couch in the dark when he asked me to stay with him. Ethan had walked over to the desk and switched off the light, and then he'd walk back over to the couch, sat down and pulled me onto his lap. He lay down with me on top of him and just relaxed.

"Liar," he breathed.

"I thought we were going to have sex," I blurted, unable to handle the silence any longer.

This time he tensed. When Ethan said nothing, I raised my head to stare down at him. It was too dark to see a thing. I wished he hadn't turned off the lights. Maybe talking would make it so much easier if I could see his face.

"Do you really think that low of me?" he asked softly.

"I don't know," I answered honestly. "You've been an asshole to me ever since we met, but then there were those moments when you were so sweet. It's hard to—"

He pressed a finger against my lips to silence me. Ethan's fingers brushed my cheekbone. I sighed when he pushed my hair behind my ear. His hand slowly slid down my neck and came to rest on his mark. I could feel his eyes burning into my skin.

"We can't have sex, Lara, no matter how badly I want to."

I blinked. "W-what?"

"When I bit you, it mixed some of my DNA with yours. You faintly carry my scent but because we haven't completed the mate bond, my scent isn't strong. If we have sex, another part of our bond would be completed."

"Would it be that bad?"

I swallowed and blinked back the tears that wanted to fall.

"It would be fucking amazing to complete our bond, beauty," Ethan quickly assured me. "If we complete the bond it would kill you once I mate with Avery."

His hand slipped to the nape of my neck where he guided my head to his shoulder. His hands slowly slipped down my back and came to a rest on my hip. Even after everything he had said, Ethan was still going to marry that woman.

"You don't belong to her," I whispered but of course he had heard me.

"I belong only to you," he muttered. "Nothing would ever change that. Not even being mated to another woman. My mind, body and soul will always yearn for you. I wished it was different, but this is how it needs to be."

My hand gripped his shirt tightly. I was going to have to stand there and watch him marry another woman. I was going to see them kissing and laughing and I wouldn't be able to do a thing about it. He said that he didn't want to hurt me by completing the mate bond—whatever that was—but he was already hurting me in the worse way possible.

"Please don't cry."

I sniffed. "I'm not crying."

"I can smell your tears."

Ethan turned until we laid on our sides facing each other. He reached up and wiped the tears from my face. I held my breath when Ethan leaned forward and slid his hand to my neck. His breath fanned my lips and then my cheeks. My heart squeezed tightly when he kissed my tears away. How could he be such an asshole one minute and a sweetheart the next?

My hand slid to his cheek when his lips found mine. He kept the kiss slow and sweet. By the time he pulled back, I was completely breathless and aching. Ethan sighed, and gripped my hip to pull my body—as much as my baby bump allowed—against his. It was hard to miss his erection digging into me. He wanted me as badly as I wanted him. But we couldn't take that step.