MATED TO SERIES COLLECTION

90.LARA: NO PAIN, NO GAIN

I stared at the mark at the crook of my neck.

A mark that I had once thought of as a brand. A mark that was never meant to mean a thing. A mark that had been made by Ethan but was now destroyed by Silas. I reached up with a shaky hand and traced the red puncture wounds his teeth had created. Somehow Silas had managed to bite me directly over Ethan's mark.

Was that the reason for the pain in my chest that wouldn't go away?

My eyes dropped to take in the bruises on the rest of my body. I turned to the side slightly and stared at my back. I had a few scratch marks that were already half healed. I was sure that Silas's back looked similar to mine; I knew his arms looked worse than my back.

Swallowing, I turned away from the mirror and walked over to the shower. I stepped under the cold water and winced. My hands clenched at my sides as I fought the urge to reach out and open the warm tap. I counted the minutes in my head before I stepped back and sucked in a deep breath. After a few seconds, I stepped forward again but this time I reached out and opened the warm tap.

I jumped when fingers brushed my lower back. Glancing over my shoulder, my body relaxed when my eyes locked on Silas's face. His eyes were focused on the skin his fingertips were tracing.

"I was rough last night." His head lowered and his lips brushed the top of my shoulder. "Forgive me, sweetness?"

I turned around and tilted my head back to look up at him. My lips tilted up into a smile but it quickly faded when he didn't return my smile. I frowned at him.

"It's okay. I know that I'll heal in a few hours," I told him. "I can't belief how much you've held back on me when we first started dating."

His eyes shot up to mine. "What?"

"When we've had sex before, you've always held back. Last night I realized—"

"I've never held back, sweetness," Silas interrupted. "When we first started dating I was still more human than Lycan. I've seen how aggressive Lycan's can be during sex, but I've never been through that until last night."

"Oh." My eyes dropped to his chest. "It was definitely an experience, but not one I'd like to repeat any time soon. I never knew that you could exercise so many muscles in one night."

His lips twitched. "I'll give you a message with some hot oil when we get out of the shower."

"Now that sounds like heaven."

Silas suddenly pressed his palm against the crook of my neck right over his newly made mark. His eyes darted up to mine and pain flashed through them. I swallowed and quickly glanced away.

"I'm sorry, Lara."

My eyes shot up to his. "You can physically remove everything about him, Silas, but you'll never be able to completely erase him. He'll always be in our hearts and in our minds. The smallest of things might suddenly remind us of him. There will always be memories, Silas. Good or bad."

Silas swallowed loudly and then leaned down to press his lips against the spot where his hand had been only seconds before. Tears burned my eyes when his lips lingered a little longer.

"I was thinking that maybe we could start new someplace else," he whispered against my ear. "Someplace where they can get to know us without anybody influencing them. A fresh start. You, me"—his hand slid down to my stomach—"and our babies."

He straightened and stared down at me. My eyes darted between his as I waited for him to tell me that he didn't really mean that. We had made plans to return back to our normal lives before, but it had failed. Was it really going to happen this time or was he just saying that because he regretted what he had done?

I licked my lips. "Do you mean it, Silas?" I asked him. "Do you really mean it?"

"We don't really have any reason to stay here," he said softly. "My fath—Devon doesn't really want me here, and after this morning, I know that none of the pack members want me here either." He pulled a face. "I don't think that we'd be able to survive in London."

I gave him a small smile. "It wouldn't be ideal, no. Not with twins on the way."

"Our babies." Silas dropped to his knees and pressed his face against my stomach. "A second chance."

"Silas, do you think that they would be like you?" I asked as I pushed a few strands of hair from his forehead. "Will they be able to shift?"

He frowned at my stomach. "The chances of them being full-blooded are bigger than them being half-breeds." His eyes shot up to mine. "You won't hate them if they can't shift, right? You won't love one of them more than you love the other?"

I could tell that it was a real fear for him. He was scared that our babies would be treated the same way his parents had treated them. I feared that it might happen too, but we had learned from their mistakes and I knew that we would be a lot better parents than they had ever been.

Cupping his cheeks, I leaned down to press a kiss against his lips. "No matter what, I will love them both equally and I know that you will love them like that too."

Silas blew out a breath and smiled. "Let's shower so I can go make some calls. We need to find a place to live first before we move."