ROGUE

38 : I'll find you

Your POV

Murderer.
That's what I now could be titled as.
And that was all I could think about as I slid into the lethal ribbons of knives.

Pain shot through my ankles and calves, but I managed to stop myself getting buried any deeper in the deadly wire by gripping onto the slope which I slid down.

Kieran's dead body had slipped down too, and he was completely tangled.
The pain was unbearable, like a million knives piercing my skin.

I tried to pull my body free, but the wire only wound itself tighter, the barbs digging deeper into my flesh.
I bit the inside of my cheek to keep myself from screaming, and the copper tang of blood filled my mouth.

Jason appeared from the top of the ditch.
"Oh my god, Y/n. Are you okay?"

"I think so." Was all I could manage.

"Stay still, I'm coming down." He said as he swung his legs over the edge, trying to lower himself down on the muddy bank.

"No," I said quickly. "You could get hurt."

He ignored me and continued to skid down the slope until he finally reached the bottom.
He tried his best to avoid the coils of razor wire as he dropped down beside me.
"I'm gonna get you out of this, don't move."
He tried to untangle the wire but the metal teeth clung to my leg.

"Where did everyone else go?" I asked.
I didn't care about myself.
I just wanted everyone to be safe.

"They're all okay, I told them to leave when Kaine-" Jason trailed off and his eyes welled. "Kaine got shot."

I inhaled and my breath caught. "I know. I'm sorry."

Jason shook his head and sniffed, then continued trying to free me, completely hiding the hurt. He screwed up his face in pain as the metal teeth dug into his hands.

I winced and clutched his arm. "It hurts." I yelped.

"Shh," he murmured. "I'm right here." He said softly.

A sob caught in my throat.
"Jason, I killed Kieran."

Jason stopped for a second and looked at me.
"You saved my life, that's not a bad thing."

"He probably had a wife and kids, and I took his life." Tears pricked the back of my eyes.

"Y/n, we don't have to think about that right now. I just want to get you out of here."

"You won't be able to." I whimpered.

Razor wire was unstoppable.
Jason wasn't going to be able to free me without wire cutters.
His hands were already soaked in blood from where he had tried to unwind the silver ribbons curling around me.

The sound of police sirens rung in my ears, and reality settled.
Jason McCann.
Police.
He couldn't stay here.

I took his face into my hands. "You have to go."

"Are you insane? I'm not leaving you." His voice cracked.

"Listen to me. So many people have died tonight. And you're Jason McCann, they'll arrest you without a thought."

"I don't care."

I held Jason's face in my hands.
"I do. I won't be able to handle it if you get arrested. They'll give you one of those lethal injection things... and you'll be gone." My voice cracked as I spoke.

"Only the CIA know my identity. Cops don't."

"Jason, please go. It's obvious who you are." I whispered.

Jason pressed his forehead against mine.
He ran his fingers along the side of my face and a different kind of pain consumed me.
"I shouldn't have pushed you away." He said.

All I could think about was getting him out of here.
What happened after the kiss didn't change the way I felt about him.

I wasn't sure anything could.

"It doesn't matter-"

"Let me say this, I was scared, I still am. I'm not a good person, Y/n. But I want to be. For you and only for you. It's like you know me," He paused and shook his head. "I'm not saying this right."

I touched his cheek. "Yes you are." I said softly.

"I've never really had anything that was mine and I never cared until now. And deep down, I know you aren't mine, you never were... but I want you to be."

Voices filled the night air and the sirens got louder.
I have to get him out of here.

I ran my finger over his lips.
"I don't know what to say."
There was too much to say and no way to say it.

Jason's eyes were glossy. "Do you care about me?" He asked.
I sensed him watching me.

"Don't do this." I whispered.

Jason's lips grazed mine.
"Answer me." He whispered.

My breath hitched.
"I care. But I need you to leave me." The words hurt to say.

Jason pressed his lips against mine with a hunger that matched my own.
For a moment, there was nothing but the two of us. He slid his mouth around to my ear.
"You're all I want. All I need."

"I'll check the east side," a voice called through the rain.
I ran my hand over Jason's face. Trying to remember every curve and every line.

"Please go."

"Y/n, I already told you. I'm not leaving you for anything."

"They'll arrest you and you'll be killed. Please, I'm begging you."

Jason hesitated "I'll find you, I swear," his voice cracked once again. "I-"

"Go." I shoved him away.

He looked at me one last time before turning and pulling himself up the muddy slope.
As soon as he was out of sight, numbness wrapped itself around me and the pain in my legs was nothing compared to the pain in my heart.

At least he's safe.

"Over here! I found someone."
An officer appeared at the top of the ditch.
"You're gonna be okay, miss." He said.

I searched for Jason's face in my mind.
Tears ran down my cheeks.
I wanted his body wrapped around mine.

Two cops slid down to save me.
I laid in the mud as they struggled to cut me free.
"The ambulance is on its way, but we're gonna take good care of you. You'll be fine."

I won't be fine without Jason. 

-----------

I waited in the back of the police car.
There was no explanation for Kieran's death.
The razor wire had shredded his body enough to hide the evidence of a bullet wound.

But right now, I felt broken.
And I knew there was only one person who could fix me.

I heard Jason's voice over and over in my head, promising me that he would find me.

I wondered if I would ever see him again.

I couldn't lose him.

THE END

Keep reading for a sequel.

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