ROGUE

07 : Wrong In So Many Ways

Your POV

We didn't make up the way I thought we would.

Jason never waltzed causally down the stairs to tell me that he forgave me for saying something so cruel or that he was sorry for over-reacting.

He never rushed into the living room to crash his lips down onto mine and then end up forgiving me in the sheets.

He never even came downstairs to speak to me.

Instead, he ignored me.
And this continued for three days straight.

Sleeping beside him at night was so awkward that I even considered sleeping in one of the spare bedrooms, but I hated the thought of having to lie in bed alone. I had tried to talk to him, but he would just roll over onto his side and pull the covers closer up towards his neck.
I'd be lying if I said the silence wasn't affecting me, and an awful feeling of loneliness had completely started to torture my mind.
It wasn't like him to be so affected by words, and it showed his vulnerability.
It revealed the humanity that few people believed was actually there.

By the time the early hours of Friday evening rolled around, I had had enough of the silent treatment and was finally driven right over the edge. Craving some sort of attention, I decided to make that one stupid decision which I knew Jason would literally murder me for if he ever found out...

I wanted to see Chris.

It was wrong in so many ways, but I felt like I needed to; it would put my mind at ease and probably Chris's as well.

Finding out that Chris was alive did not make me question my feelings for Jason; for I had never felt the way I did towards him about anyone in my life before. I loved Jason, and nothing was going to change that. But unfortunately, a part of me still cared about Chris. He was my first boyfriend, and our relationship had lasted for years, having it teared away from me was rough.

I nibbled on my bottom lip and winced at my own thoughts as I pulled my tight black jeans up my legs, then clumsily fastened up the button whilst letting my eyes scan the inside of the open wardrobe for a decent-looking belt.
I settled for a black leather one with a shiny gold buckle, and unintentionally began to hum as I threaded it through the loops in my jeans.
I didn't really know how I was going to do this; because showing up at Chris's house with no warning what-so-ever would probably give him a heart attack... Especially due to the fact that he literally only just found out that I was still alive.

But unfortunately, there was no other way.
I didn't have his number in my phone; and it had been almost a year since I last called it.
Those patterned digits had been completely swiped from my memory.

Shaking my head, I reached for my black leather jacket and pulled it over my nude-shaded tank top, before grabbing my suede heeled boots and slipping them on over my awkward neon coloured socks, completely and thankfully concealing the fluorescent material.
My makeup was already done - and it had been done pretty well because I had been bored all day and had been practicing my skills, so there was no need to add to it. My hair fell naturally too, but I decided to keep it that way because I felt confident.

Once I was satisfied with my outfit, I grabbed my purse and casually strolled out of my room and descended down the staircase into the living room. My heartbeat sped up when I noticed Jason sat on the sofa, with one of his arms resting on the back of it, and his brown eyes trained dedicatedly on the flickering tv.
It was like living in only his presence, and to be honest, our complete absence of communication was becoming creepy and even kind of frightening.

I sunk my teeth nervously into my bottom lip and tried my best to walk past him without making eye contact; or any kind of contact for that matter. I focused on heading straight for the door, but I suddenly felt his gaze burning into me, and I couldn't help but glance at him awkwardly. His eyebrows were furrowed and confusion was coloured on his face, I rested my hand on the door handle and waited a second.
Jason's mouth parted slowly and his eyes skimmed over my outfit, pooling with a faint sense of lust, until it was quickly replaced by the nothingness that I had been seeing for the past three days.
"Where are you going?" He mumbled lowly, which startled me in a weird way, because it was the first time that I heard his voice in what seemed like years, even though it was only around seventy-two hours.

I raised my eyebrows at him and flicked my tongue over my lower lip. "He remembers how to speak." I stated, letting my tone drip with sass and a slight irritation that he had decided to break the ice at this very moment.

He closed his eyes and breathed out a strong breath of air through his house, clearly unwilling to bicker. "Answer the question." He muttered, before opening his eyes again and fixing them on my nude-coloured top, which was desperately skintight and also kind of low and revealing. "And why are you wearing that?" He furrowed his brows further, undoubtedly confused at my sudden change in dress choice.

"I'm going shopping with Alara." I lied, keeping my voice flat to hide any traces of the truth. "And I wanted to wear something different for once." I shrugged, sliding my hands down my material covered stomach. "I think it looks nice."

Jason shrugged and turned back to the TV. "Whatever," He sighed, bringing his hand to rub the skin on the back of his neck. "You gonna be back late?" He asked, sounding bored and literally uninterested.
If he had got up from the couch and walked over to actually sort things out, it probably would've changed my mind about going out to see Chris tonight, but the small amount of dismissive attention that I was receiving from Jason just wasn't enough.

"Don't know, does it matter?" I asked flatly, earning another glance of disapproval from him.

"Well I think we need to talk. Don't you?" He replied, raising an eyebrow and reaching for the remote beside him, before pressing a button and pausing the annoying characters on the TV.

I shrugged. "You had three days to talk to me, I'm busy tonight." I pulled on the door handle and opened it. "You're a little late."

Jason's features crinkled with a slight irritation as I took a step outside, and he quickly heaved himself up from the couch and straightened out his t-shirt. "Y/n, wait." He said, causing me to turn around and look at him, my face undoubtedly twisted in a permanent frown.
"I want to know what time you'll be back." He sighed, latching his teeth onto his bottom lip and probably feeling just as awkward as I was.

"I don't know." I shrugged. "Let's say around ten?"

He sucked his teeth and twisted his tattooed arm towards him so he could take a glance at his watch, when he looked back up at me, the suspicion in his eyes was undeniable. "It's seven, and already dark." He muttered. "Don't the shops close at like... five?"

"Not the ones in the town square, they close at midnight." I quickly covered, feeling a ball of saliva collect in the back of my throat from the fact that I was literally lying to him so I could go and meet my ex boyfriend.
It made me feel sick but I couldn't convince myself to stay home.

He hesitated for a second, before letting out another sigh. "Alright, have fun." His gaze switched towards the ground. "And we'll talk later."

"Okay." I nodded, before sending him a forced smile which he uneasily returned. It felt weird to leave the house without a good-bye peck on the cheek, or a quick 'I love you', and I watched as he slowly shut the door until I was standing alone in the darkness.

I inhaled deeply and my breath hitched.
This was going to be a long night.

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Thanks for reading

if this was bad it's because it's 11pm and i haven't slept for like 2 days and i'm so tired (every chapter will be edited when the book is finished soooo)