Destiel One-shots

PTA Dads

Set in AU

Cas Winchester sat in an office meeting, bored out of his mind as Naomi gave some presentations about increasing sales or some shit. He didn't really know what she was talking about, nor did he care. So when his phone quietly buzzed, signalling a text message, Cas sneakily grabbed his phone and glanced down.

New Text Message from Ellie

Ellie? Why would she be texting him now? Ellie was Cas's ten year old daughter, and as long as Dean hadn't done something stupid and irresponsible, she should be at the school fundraiser right now, keeping an eye on her little brother, Bobby, and Dean himself. 

Cas glanced around the room. No one was paying attention to him. He doubted they were even paying attention to Naomi's obnoxious presentation either, but at least they weren't staring at him as he opened the text message.

Are you almost done at work? Ellie's message read. Bobby's getting bored, and Dad isn't allowed to leave yet.

Of course Dean wasn't allowed to leave yet. It was only 5'o clock, and the fundraiser ran until 7. Dean, like the rest of the parents, had been forced into bringing some baked goods to sell at the event, which, for a chef like Dean, had been an easy task. He'd shown up with four pies and two batches of chocolate chip cookies, all homemade. The plan, Dean had said, was to sell the cookies, and bring the pies home to eat them himself. Somehow, Cas hadn't been surprised at all at his husband's motives.

I'm still in a meeting, I'll be done as soon as I can. Cas texted back, glancing back up at Naomi to give the impression that he was paying attention. His phone buzzed again.

OK. The word doomed Cas to boredom for another five minutes, until his phone went off again.

Dad's fighting the PTA moms again.

Oh no. This was never good. Dean tried his very best to be a good father, and he was one, and he tried to be involved with the school Ellie and Bobby went to. But the one thing Dean wasn't prepared for was the PTA moms.

The snobby bitches, Dean had deemed them, who thought that their child sat on a golden pedestal above everyone else. They gossiped, they were rude, and they poked and prodded at everyone else's kids and pointed out everyone's flaws in everything they did.

Dean could handle an insult to himself. He could kind of handle an insult to his efforts and his food, if he used some willpower.

But Dean Winchester was NOT a man who could handle an insult to his family, especially not to his children. And thus, he and the PTA moms did not exactly get along.

Try to keep him calm, Cas texted back, hoping Dean could control himself. Ellie and Bobby tried their best, but they all knew that the only person capable of truly calming Dean down was Cas.

He's smiling at Judy's mom, not good.

Oh boy. When Dean was truly irritated with the PTA moms, he'd plaster on a fake smile and act like one of them. That's how you knew he was close to murdering one of them. It didn't help of course, that Dean was currently smiling at Helen Peterson, Judy's mom. Helen was the biggest bitch of the PTA, to the point where even Cas hated her. Judy was a sweet girl, a good friend of Ellie's, but her mother?

Well, Cas would not blame his husband if Dean snapped and bitchslapped her before the fundraiser was over.

Uh oh.

....Are you sure you can't get out of the meeting early? Somebody's gotta calm him down. Cas went to reply, but the texts kept coming.

He's mad now.

He's REALLY mad now.

Bobby jumped in, texting a much harsher version of reality than Ellie.

DAD'S ABOUT TO THROW DOWN WITH JUDY'S MOM.

YOU CAN SEE THE MURDEROUS RAGE IN HIS EYES.

I wonder what she said about us....

Thankfully for Cas, the meeting ended, and Cas headed out of the office and drove for the school. Maybe if he got there fast enough, Helen Peterson would still be breathing when he arrived.

He walked into the fundraiser just as things started to get out of hand.

Dean and Helen were yelling at each other in front of the desserts table, to the point where people were staring. Dean stood defensively on one side of the table, while Helen stood on the other. Bobby and Ellie cowered next to the fight, close, but not too close. Judy, thankfully was nowhere to be found. Good. Cas didn't want her around in case Dean actually murdered her mother.

He wasn't sure what bold statement he had just missed, but by Dean's reaction, he assumed it only would've made him pissed off himself.

"OH, YOU WANNA TALK SHIT?" Dean shouted. Cas saw what Bobby meant about the murderous rage now. Dean was in full rage mode. "FINE! LET'S TALK SHIT. YOUR DAUGHTER'S A WIMP, AND YOUR HUSBAND IS AN UGLY ASS MAN-CHILD." Helen gasped, glaring at him.

"How DARE you-" She snatched a cookie off one of the trays before them and threw it at Dean. He shot her a deadpan expression and promptly flipped a whole plate of brownies on her-Helen's own "gluten free vegan brownies" I might add. "You insufferable little-"

"Try me, bitch," Dean shot back. 

"OKAY!" Cas interrupted, sliding up beside Dean and grabbing his arm. "Time to go home!" Bobby and Ellie breathed sighs of relief.

"Oh, we're just gettin' started," Dean countered.

"You utter neanderthal," Helen spat at him. "We come out here to have a NICE fundraiser, and YOU PICK A FIGHT and MAKE A SCENE-"

"And If you DARE insult my children again, I'll punch your freaking gluten free FACE IN!" Dean countered. "FUCK YOU AND YOUR BROWNIES, HELEN." Cas tugged at hid arm, and Dean complied, Bobby and Ellie following close behind as they left the fundraiser.

Dean calmed down quickly as they walked across the parking lot, Cas's hand still hooked on his arm gently, just in case.

"THAT. WAS. AWESOME!" Bobby exploded, unable to help himself. "Can you yell at Marty's mom next?!"

"No one will be yelling at anyone again," Cas said sternly, shooting his son a look before glancing back at Dean.

"I hate her." Dean declared. "Completely hate her."

"She's not worth it."

"Don't care."

"Do I even want to know what she said?" Dean looked at him, and glanced over at Ellie and Bobby, who playfully shoved at each other and laughed as they walked through the parking lot.

"I'll tell you later," He offered. "And then restrain you from hunting her down and murdering her."

"I would never-" Dean raised his eyebrows.

"Jenny Millstone, Ellie's kindergarten year, the Halloween party?"

".....That was NOT my fault-"

"So she just HAPPENED to fall down all those stairs?"

"....Yes. It was a freak accident." Cas said innocently.

"Uh huh," Dean grinned. "Maybe we should stop participating in the PTA events before somebody ends up dead."

"But if we stopped participating, when who's going to tell Helen Peterson that she married an ugly man child?" Dean laughed.

"Alright, fine, but the next bake sale is all you."

"Deal." Cas nudged him with a smile. 

"Think Bobby's gonna be disappointed that we didn't throw down with a PTA mom?"

"Nah, Maybe we'll throw down next time to keep him entertained."

"We're awesome parents."

"Hell yeah we are."