Destiel One-shots

We Know, Guys. We've Always Known.

Dean and Cas were dating.

They had been for a few months, and both of them had decided it would be best to come clean to their family and friends about it, so that they could quit sneaking around like hopeless teenagers.

Cas would tell the angels in heaven, and Dean would break the news to their mortal family.

They didn't exactly get the reaction they were expecting, of course.

******

Cas popped into Heaven, and quickly located as many of the angels as he could, so Gabriel, Anna, Hannah, Balthazar, Naomi, and Gadreel were all present for the news.

"Dean and I are dating." Cas announced. The angels of heaven blinked at him, and a silence settled over them.

"......Were you expecting some sort of big reveal?" Gabriel asked. "Cause we all kinda knew."

"We did?" Hannah questioned. "I didn't know. I mean, I definitely suspected, but I didn't know."

"......But....." Anna started, seriously confused. "......But I slept with Dean...." Cas shrugged.

"Mine now, bitch, and he said I'm better." He shot back. Gabriel sighed happily.

"Oh, how I've missed Sassy Cassie." He commented. Balthazar let out a fake gasp of shock.

"CASTIEL dating DEAN WINCHESTER," He declared. "Why, how absurd! I never would've put you two together! I never saw this coming!" Cas fought the urge to roll his eyes.

"You can't date a human, Castiel," Naomi started.

"Naomi, shut your cakehole or I will personally strangle you with Destiel's built up sexual tension." Gabriel warned. 

"That's not possible."

"Try me, bitch."

"Nobody is strangling anybody with sexual tension." Cas insisted.

"Oh really, cause I hear Sam's been drowning under the weight of it for years. My poor little Samsquatch."

"Okay, now Gabriel and Sam?" Hannah went on. "That I always knew was happening."

"Everyone knows that's happening, Hannah, catch up." Gadreel advised. "I've been in the dude's head for crying out loud." He shuddered. "The THINGS I've SEEN."

"Now you know where Luci got his ideas," Gabriel said with a wink.

"You are a disturbing being, brother." Gadreel declared.

"Hey, you've got your fetishes, and I've got mine."

"Disturbing. So disturbing." Cas rolled his eyes. Well, at least they weren't murdering him.

*******

Dean was in the bunker, and he found Charlie, Sam, and Jack playing a game of Go Fish in the library, with Charlie and Sam's feet propped up on the table, and Jack frowning, a little confused by the game.

"Cas and I are dating," Dean announced. Charlie, Sam, Jack didn't bother looking up from their cards.

"We know." Charlie confirmed. Dean blinked.

"You know?" He echoed. Jack snorted.

"Oh yeah, Dean, we all know." He insisted.

"Just answer me this," Sam began, glancing up at his brother. "Did you first sleep with him before or after you went to Purgatory?" Dean looked mortified and the moose rolled his eyes. 

"Just answer the question, Narnia king." Charlie ordered.

"During, actually." Dean admitted. "After I found him in Purgatory, we....."

"Got it. Charlie, you owe me ten bucks." Sam offered.

"No fair, you said they wouldn't have because Benny was there!"

"Apparently that didn't matter. Now pay up." Grumbling, Charlie handed over the cash.

"My turn for a question." She declared, reaching over and covering Jack's innocent ears. "Are you a bottom, Dean Winchester? And be honest."

Red did not accurately describe the color on Dean's face.

"Yes." He muttered. Charlie held out her hand and Sam sighed before handing her the money back.

"How did you-" Sam started.

"A fangirl always knows, Sammoose, the fangirl always knows."