Do you belive in forever? (Max Verstappen)

Chapter 40

The next day I had spent in the office because I had to concentrate and thanks to Max, I would not have been able to do this in the hotel. This was also a reason why I avoided home office until now, because I was distracted too quickly.

Now I enjoyed lying next to Max in bed and just having silence. The only thing I heard was the slight snoring of Max. He lay with his back to me and was still sleeping peacefully. I would have liked to have slept, but as confused as my body was in terms of sleeping, I couldn't sleep more than ten o'clock at the moment.

I wasn't asleep either, but my body didn't want to sleep any more. Frustrated, I turned on my back and looked at the ceiling. I didn't want to wake Up Max, so I just lay there and stared at the ceiling. My thoughts drifted to the conversation with my boss.

Mr Schmidt himself had said that he did not know Max personally, so I should not pay attention to his words. But not everyone is afraid that you could be deceived, especially with a man like Max. He looked extremely good and his success was no less unattractive to some women. What if one day I wasn't enough because I wasn't a model. I was sporty, but I liked to have some flesh on my bones and would call them defined curves.

"If you continue to stare such holes into the ceiling, it will fall on our heads," came it tired from the right. Slightly terrified I looked at a not really awake Max. He had already closed his eyes and cuddled up to me. He had carefully placed his arm over my stomach, as my ribs still hurt a little when touched.

With my left hand, I reached for his and crossed our fingers: "How many women have you had sex with." I didn't know why I was asking this question at that very moment, but it was already too late. I had wanted to ask this question many times, but I did not dare.

"What?" Max was probably awake. Perplexed, he had opened his eyes and sat down slightly. I did the same to him and repeated my question as confidently as I could. I had to ask myself if I wanted to know the answer.

Max tried to catch himself: "I've already understood the question, but why do you want to know? It doesn't matter how many women I've done; I don't ask you."

"Because I want to know, as your girlfriend, I think I have a right to know. Precisely because you are closing yourself up to me," I tried to justify my question. But Actually, I didn't know why I had asked this question.

Max sighed and let himself fall into the pillow and stared at the ceiling himself: "Hanna, I just want to protect you. You're not there yet and I want this relationship to work, so we can't just leave the issue.'

"No, we can't, because I want to be able to understand it. What do you want to protect me from? You're not the first man in my bed Max, I know what it feels like. So, what do you want to protect me from and why shouldn't I be ready?" I was in despair. When it comes to sex, he always looked at me and said I wasn't ready yet.

Max sat down and wanted to disappear into the bathroom, but I held him: "Hanna leave it. You're not there yet and you're pasta! Trust me, I'll explain everything to you soon, but not today or tomorrow." While Max went to the bathroom, I hit the mattress in anger.

Petulant as I was, I quickly put on things and just left the room. I had to react and for that I needed movement and fresh air. At that moment I wish Jessica, she was unfortunately a few kilometres away at her home. So, her voice had to be enough to build me up and just be there.

I simply ignored Max calls and messages and settled on a park bench, choosing Jessi's number: "Oh you're still alive, how beautiful." Came from the other side, in the background I could see the voices of the guys, but I just didn't care.

"I only wrote to you yesterday," I replied, slightly confused. Sure, my friends just got a little too short, but I tried my best to write with them every day.