In Another Life

37

I turned and walked into my room, closing the door behind me, and leaning against it. I could still feel the impression of his lips on mine. Did that actually just happen? Did Colby Brock just kiss me? It's like I was living in another life, because this one couldn't possibly belong to me. I was torn though. When he said it was a mistake, I felt my heart break a little. I saw the uncertainty in his eyes when he broke away, the regret that he instantly felt for doing what should be one of the best moments of my life. Now, it was tainted. But I didn't understand why he did it in the first place. I knew he wasn't drunk. He lied about that...so why? Was he just going to try and get with me because I'm a fan? Because I have a crush on him? That doesn't seem like something he would do but I didn't actually know him...I only felt like I did. "You okay T?" Denise asked, walking out of the bathroom. She had washed her face, and changed into her pjs, a white cotton tank, and fluffy pair of black and white zebra stripe pajama pants. I nodded, and felt the tears start to well up in my eyes a little. No, I wasn't gonna do that. Colby Brock or not, I wasn't going to cry over a stupid guy that kissed me, then regretted it. Fuck that. I sniffed it back and nodded. "I will be. Neece, he kissed me and I'm not sure what to do or how to feel about it." Her mouth fell open, and her eyebrows shot up. "Who kissed you?" I chuckled, a little sadly. "Colby. Just now. In the hallway." "Are you serious? Oh my God, that's amazing! What was it like? Everythingyoudreamedof? Howdidithappen? Youhaveto TELLME EVERYTHING!" She wouldn't stop talking! Her words were going so fast that they were running together even, making it hard for me to understand. Denise grabbed my arm and pulled me to the bed, almost running, sitting down and pulling me down beside her. "SPILL!" She replied, staring at me intently. Jesus, she was making me nervous. I reached up rubbed the back of my neck, calming the goosebumps that popped up as I relived the kiss. "I don't know how it happened really. We were saying goodnight, and he took my hand. It felt more intimate than it should have. Next thing I know, he's pulling me against him, and his lips are on mine." "SOOO? How was it??" She exclaimed, clapping her hands at me. "It was amazing. Better than I imagined. It went deeper too, not just a little peck, but like a REAL kiss. The man knows how to work that mouth." I sighed deeply, missing it already. "Holy shit," she breathed out, pressing her fingers to her mouth. "So what happened?" I shrugged, trying not to show her how hurt I was from it. "He broke away, apologized, and said it was a mistake. Begged me not to tell anyone." "Oh no, T, I'm so sorry," she said, leaning in and wrapping her arms around me. I always hated it when people did this when I was upset. It made it harder to fight the tears, so I shrugged her off. "It's fine Neece. It is what it is, right? Besides, at least I got a kiss from Colby Brock. I'm not going to forget that any time soon," I replied, attempting to smile. She returned it with a sad smile of her own. "That's true. Something to remember when we return to the middle of nowhere. But we've still got four more days here, so who knows? Maybe he'll see it wasn't a mistake at all. What kind of life would that be? Imagine dating THE Colby Brock," she sighed. "Wish Corey was here. I miss him." I rolled my eyes and smiled. "I would say you can't miss someone that you don't know, but I would be lying," I replied. "Yeah, you would be," she said, falling back on her bed. I stood up and got changed before grabbing my phone and getting into bed. I hadn't been on my fan pages all day, so I went to Insta first, watched Brennen's story, saw that Sam, Jake, and Tara had posted a couple of pics, but nothing from Colby. I updated my page, then went to Twitter. The image of Colby scrolling past my tweet entered my brain, so I definitely wasn't tweeting anything like that again. Not for now anyways. I went to my notices thread and looked through the couple of times that I had managed to get a like or a reply from Colby on Twitter. It rarely happens, so it was special. It was weird thinking that, considering that I had just been in the hallway with his tongue in my mouth. He was right though. It was a mistake. We lived too far apart, and there was no way that I would be dating Colby Brock. Not in this lifetime, or any for that matter. Things like that didn't happen to me. That was just a dream. The bad thing is that I've always known that but somehow still held that little dream inside me, that little piece of hope that wouldn't die. Now this happens, and my heart fell for him even more. "Fuuuuck," I groaned, throwing my phone down on the bed, and rubbing my face with both hands. "He's got me fucked up Neece," I whined, looking over to her. She rolled onto her side, propping her head on her hand. "I know baby. It's gonna be okay though. Do you want me to kick his ass? Cuz I will. I'll even get Sarah's crazy ass to help me," she said, her eyes dead serious. I smiled, feeling grateful for my friend right now. The friend that I wouldn't have if it weren't for Sam and Colby. Damn it. I shook my head. "No, but thank you. I love you." "I love you too T. Now get some sleep. Have sweet sweet dreams of Colby. I know the situation sucks but think about it this way. You just got something from him that most, if not all, fans are never gonna get. Enjoy that. You're special to him now.