166 Colby's POV

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By the time I left Kira's place, I felt like actual shit. I hated doing this to her, because I knew that she did love me. It was horrible to know that someone  you loved, loved someone else. I knew from experience. It was actual torture listening to Kira remind me that Terra had left me. But I hadn't actually asked her to stay. I didn't know what she had been through in the past three years but she made it sound like it was horrible. I had to talk to her. Only she didn't even want me calling her. She had refused to give me her number saying that she didn't think us talking was a good idea. Was that because of Justin, or because she still had feelings for me and didn't want to risk her relationship with him? How could I get in touch with her? I knew absolutely nothing about her now and that broke my heart even more. I thought about it on the way home, and had finally come up with a plan by the time I walked into my house. I would ask Sarah. Hopefully, she would feel sorry enough for me to betray her friend's confidence just a little. If not, maybe I could coerce Brennen into talking to her. I knew that wasn't right but I had to do what I had to do. Nothing was going to stop me. Not this time. Not distance, not time, not boyfriends, or girlfriends. I wasn't going out without a fight. I went straight to my room, not even bothering to see if the other guys had made it home yet. I sat down on my couch and pulled out my phone, hitting Brennen's name the second I saw it. My nerves had my leg bouncing and me chewing on my damn cuticles. I never did that, but here I was a nervous mess. "What's up man? You okay? How's Kira?" Brennen's voice echoed through the little speaker. I closed my eyes when he said Kira's name. I think it was just now hitting me that I had ended things with her, without even knowing what my future held. But it wasn't right of me to keep her hanging on as a consolation prize. I really did like her though. This hurt, and I was going to miss her, but it didn't hurt nowhere nearly as bad as it did when Terra and I had split. And we weren't even in what you would call a real relationship. "Hey brother. Um, I'm okay but I just broke up with Kira,"I replied, fixing my hair with my fingers, then twisting my helix piercing. I heard Brennen sigh heavily into the phone. "Yeah, I kind of thought that would happen. I could see it on your face. You're not over Terra, huh?" I shook my head, even though he couldn't see me. "No...I don't think I ever was or that I ever will be, honestly. She owns my heart Bren." "You wanna talk to Sarah? Is that why you called? Or you want me to ask her for the number for you?" I loved that he knew what I needed. No one was as close to me as Sam, but Brennen knew me pretty damn well. "Would you?" I asked, man enough to admit that I was kind of scared to do it. I didn't know what to expect, from Sarah and definitely not from Terra. "Yeah man, no problem. Hold on," he replied, chuckling a little. "Hey babe!" He yelled. I heard her answer him from far away. "You got Terra's number? Colby wants it." Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Was she going to give it to me, or was she going to give me a hard time? Sarah was a savage when she wanted to be and especially when it had to do with her friends. "Not gonna work brother. Sorry, I tried. Here she is," Brennen replied, before Sarah's voice exploded through the phone. "Why the fuck do you want her number now? Why now of all times, when she's finally happy? Colby, you cannot go in and fuck up her life again. Not again. You don't even know what she's been through and a lot of it was because of you. Because she couldn't handle losing you!" I let her finish and she was breathing heavily when she did, the anger just seeping through the phone. "Sarah, you're right. I don't want to fuck up her life. I would never want that. I have no idea what she's been through, but it killed me to lose her too. I was an absolute mess without her, at first," I told her, trying to pour as much sincerity and honesty into my voice as I could. She was silent for a moment before she answered. "So why now Colby? Why, when she's happy?" I leaned forwards and rested my forehead on my hand. "Because I saw her Sarah. When I saw her, it all came back. The memories, the nights we shared, the feelings we shared. I love her and I don't want to lose her. I just want to talk to her. If she doesn't want me, then that's it. But I love her with everything in me, and I can't just walk away without knowing if she loves me back," my voice almost broke on the last line, but I was able to hold it together. "Fine," Sarah said quietly. "I'll give you her number. But don't call until closer to three. Justin will probably be in the bed, but Terra likes to sit out on their balcony and look at the stars, while she organizes her photography portfolio. She's actually going to need to learn not to do that during the week, cuz she just got this new job and she needs to sleep." Their balcony. I didn't miss that part. So she lived with him. It was that serious. "She lives with him?" I asked, already knowing the answer. "Yeah, she does. Justin has been there for her through a lot Colby. You weren't there. You don't know how bad it had gotten, how bad it was. Justin helped her, and showed her that she was strong enough." I didn't like the way she said that. "What happened Sarah? What happened to Terra after I left?" I was scared of her answer but I needed to know. "That's not for me to tell you Colby."

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