Imagines and One-Shots (Book Three)

Spit Take (Damien Haas)

word count: 2069
requested by: none but this is dedicated to my bby ​palayeeeroyale on tumblr
pronouns: she/her
warnings: swears (obviously. have yall met me???), one mention of eat-it-or-yeet-it-induced vomiting
fandom: smosh
au type: you're famous, youtuber
summary: the full-time cast have finally convinced their favorite editor to be on an episode of try not to laugh
inspired by: Smosh's "Try Not To Laugh Challenge"
authors notes: i don't know how well this is gonna do but i've had this idea for a while and finally just decided to write it for the annual birthday imagine, so i hope you enjoy!!! (also i know they dont do the water anymore but to infinity and fuck it am i right haters)
other parts: none

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"Alright, Mr. Haas," you sighed as you walked out from backstage with a clipboard in your hand, "We got your car all detailed and ready to go; I just have a couple updates and you can be on your way." Damien smiled, nodding his head as he played along. "Okay, first one: We did have to do a little bit more work than we originally planned. We did find that a few stains were harder to get out, with them being a very dark, almost blood red color."

"Oh no!" you heard Courtney laugh, followed by Keith's realization as well.

"Y/N!" he groaned, but you could hear his smile in it, "No!" Damien just looked confused, not having caught on yet as you continued.

"Um... We also noticed a bit of an odor coming from the trunk, so we did open that up," you nodded, "And I'm terribly sorry if I'm overstepping, but I just have to ask: What's with the head in the cooler?" Damien made a noise of surprise, but managed to keep the water in his mouth. "I- Listen," you rushed, "I don't want you to feel like you can't be honest with me here, I just... Look, we've all had a head in a cooler in the trunk of our car at some point in our lives, okay?" His eyes widened. "Alright, I'll just cut right to the chase here... I think what I'm saying is-" You suddenly whipped out a fake police badge from your pocket. "-I'm a cop, and you're definitely under arrest," you finished.

The moment Damien spat out his water, you weren't even fazed by some of it getting on you because you were too busy smiling victoriously. The entire room cheered while he quickly wiped his mouth and reached behind him in your direction.

"I'm so sorry!" he grabbed your elbow and brought you to him, "Did I get it on you? I'm sorry!"

"I did it!" you beamed at the camera, resting your forearms on his shoulders for a loose hug, "I used his own bit against him!" Damien's own arms wrapped tightly around your waist, happy you weren't annoyed with him for spraying you.

"How dare you!" he giggled, "That's my plot twist!"

"I'm testing out my techniques," you insisted innocently, "Maybe my thing on the show will be just stealing everyone else's jokes." The rest of the group simply laughed as one voice came from behind the barrier.

"Damien, who do you want to go next?!" Courtney asked loudly.

"Just for that stunt, I pick Y/N!" he announced, chuckling when you rolled your eyes and shoved his shoulders.

You felt Damien squeeze your waist before letting go of you, getting up and letting you take his place in the chair while he went backstage to prepare.

"Man, she got you so good," Ian teased. You smiled to yourself as Damien responded with a silent pout.

"The only thing Damien loves more than breaking me is his own jokes," Shayne reminded everyone. You laughed loudly that time, obviously not even noticing the way it made Damien grin at the sound of it.